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> The same kind of logic can be used to tear down other types of relationships—like founder/cofounder relationships, business/employee relationships, or busines

> The same kind of logic can be used to tear down other types of relationships—like founder/cofounder relationships, business/employee relationships, or business/vendor/contractor relationships. The legal structure around these relationships promote, rather than attack the alignment of incentives. The legal structure cannot be a replacement for trust, but it does have an effect (which is why it exists at all). > If you view relationships in these win/loss terms they are never going to make sense. Everyone views relationships in this way. The more intimate and trusting the relationship (e.g. marriage), the more advantage there is in decreasing legibility [1] in order to enhance stability. However, people still track contribution in low legibility relationships, just more fuzzily. If there is an imbalance that is too great for too much time, the relationship will tend to fail. ___ 1. https://www.ribbonfarm.com/2010/07/26/a-big-little-idea-called-legibility/ https://www.ribbonfarm.com/2010/07/26/a-big-little-idea-call...

klodolph 7y ago
> Everyone views relationships in this way. This is obviously false. The degree to which you track contributions is germane and you cannot dismiss it from the conversation by saying that “everyone tracks contributions somewhat”, because the degree is important. It’s also not true that everyone tracks contributions, people in relationships are notoriously irrational and blind (especially if you define rationality relative to some “homo economicus” standard). If you cannot imagine how people could have aligned incentives in a marriage then I think your model of marriage is incomplete. If you think that marriage is a big F-U to the person in a marriage who tends to save money, I simply don’t think I have a basis to argue that point, because your model of marriage and relationships is so completely alien to mine that I don’t know where to begin to find common ground. Your viewpoint may be somewhat incomprehensible to me.

klodolph 7y ago

> Everyone views relationships in this way. This is obviously false. The degree to which you track contributions is germane and you cannot dismiss it from the conversation by saying that “everyone tracks contributions somewhat”, because the degree is important. It’s also not true that everyone tracks contributions, people in relationships are notoriously irrational and blind (especially if you define rationality relative to some “homo economicus” standard). If you cannot imagine how people could have aligned incentives in a marriage then I think your model of marriage is incomplete. If you think that marriage is a big F-U to the person in a marriage who tends to save money, I simply don’t think I have a basis to argue that point, because your model of marriage and relationships is so completely alien to mine that I don’t know where to begin to find common ground. Your viewpoint may be somewhat incomprehensible to me.