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> Even my other 9-5 friends office coworkers are not making time for their friends. Personally, I haven't had any friends since graduating HS and I dont have t

> Even my other 9-5 friends office coworkers are not making time for their friends. Personally, I haven't had any friends since graduating HS and I dont have the time to make new ones. For one, I'm pretty transient, moving every few years to take a new job as thats the only way to get a significant pay increase (I might finally settle down when and if I find a job I can enjoy somewhat)

Vysero 7y ago
"I might finally settle down when and if I find a job I can enjoy somewhat" - I share this sentiment but often wonder if it will be the same then as it would be now. I know that time passes more quickly when you are older. That and memories and events become less significant. Perhaps the wise move would be to make as many good memories as possible now while I am younger.
- non-entity 7y ago
  And I somewhat agree, but at the same time, it feels as if I've missed making prerequisite good memories that most people have and that makes it hard to make good new ones. Without any family or friends it just makes sense to put all my time and effort into takinh my career in a direction I (hope) I'll enjoy so that I can salvage at least some resemblance of satisfaction with life.
  - harshalizee 7y ago
    that's a very expensive and risky bet to make.
jacobkg 7y ago
For what it’s worth, I willingly took a pay cut for my current job which I enjoy immensely. This was something I noticed a few years ago when I experimented with using Hired. They let you set your minimum salary. When I set it very high I got matched with companies that I was very disinterested in. When I lowered my minimum salary I heard from a wider range of companies that seemed a lot more compatible with my interests and values.
- mlthoughts2018 7y ago
  I did this twice in my career & took jobs at companies that seemed very interesting, but after I joined they had bait & switched me and my job responsibilities were way different than I agreed to, and predictably nobody in HR cared. I was left with a job I disliked & never had agreed to _and_ making less money than before. I realized the likes and dislikes, interestingness, culture, etc. can never ever be enforced and can change suddenly. Meanwhile it’s much harder for compensation to change like that.
SomaticPirate 7y ago
It's interesting to hear that "not having time to make friends" is associated with career growth. All the high achievers I have met specifically carve out time for networking and the best networking usually depends on having an actual personal connection with someone. Even in tech, I have found most of my jobs by invitation which has eased the stress of the interviewing and having to get a foot in the door. Are you finding the opposite to be true?
- non-entity 7y ago
  Not really, I suppose my definition of "friend" just must be stricter as I don't consider most people I end up networking with the really be friends. More of acquaintances

Vysero 7y ago

"I might finally settle down when and if I find a job I can enjoy somewhat" - I share this sentiment but often wonder if it will be the same then as it would be now. I know that time passes more quickly when you are older. That and memories and events become less significant. Perhaps the wise move would be to make as many good memories as possible now while I am younger.

non-entity 7y ago
And I somewhat agree, but at the same time, it feels as if I've missed making prerequisite good memories that most people have and that makes it hard to make good new ones. Without any family or friends it just makes sense to put all my time and effort into takinh my career in a direction I (hope) I'll enjoy so that I can salvage at least some resemblance of satisfaction with life.
- harshalizee 7y ago
  that's a very expensive and risky bet to make.

jacobkg 7y ago

For what it’s worth, I willingly took a pay cut for my current job which I enjoy immensely. This was something I noticed a few years ago when I experimented with using Hired. They let you set your minimum salary. When I set it very high I got matched with companies that I was very disinterested in. When I lowered my minimum salary I heard from a wider range of companies that seemed a lot more compatible with my interests and values.

mlthoughts2018 7y ago
I did this twice in my career & took jobs at companies that seemed very interesting, but after I joined they had bait & switched me and my job responsibilities were way different than I agreed to, and predictably nobody in HR cared. I was left with a job I disliked & never had agreed to _and_ making less money than before. I realized the likes and dislikes, interestingness, culture, etc. can never ever be enforced and can change suddenly. Meanwhile it’s much harder for compensation to change like that.

SomaticPirate 7y ago

It's interesting to hear that "not having time to make friends" is associated with career growth. All the high achievers I have met specifically carve out time for networking and the best networking usually depends on having an actual personal connection with someone. Even in tech, I have found most of my jobs by invitation which has eased the stress of the interviewing and having to get a foot in the door. Are you finding the opposite to be true?

non-entity 7y ago
Not really, I suppose my definition of "friend" just must be stricter as I don't consider most people I end up networking with the really be friends. More of acquaintances