4 ms·

From what I could tell, the links you posted are no evidence to the contrary. First, child abuse is beyond what most would call "parenting"; that term is mostl

From what I could tell, the links you posted are no evidence to the contrary. First, child abuse is beyond what most would call "parenting"; that term is mostly applied to things like strictness with respect to school homework, video games, pressure to choose certain careers, etc. My argument was that those of us that care about giving their children the best should not sweat too much over where precisely to draw the lines, because the effect of these decisions on the child's personality and life outcome is minimal. Second, it is very possible that the same genes that increase the chance of a person being a child abuser also increase the chance of their child being, say, an alcoholic or criminal.

cubix 16y ago
"Lulu handed me her 'surprise', which turned out to be a card," writes Chua in her explosive new memoir... "More accurately, it was a piece of paper folded crookedly in half, with a big happy face on the front. Inside, 'Happy Birthday, Mummy! Love, Lulu' was scrawled in crayon above another happy face. I gave the card back to Lulu. 'I don't want this,' I said. 'I want a better one – one that you've put some thought and effort into. I have a special box, where I keep all my cards from you and Sophia, and this one can't go in there.' I grabbed the card again and flipped it over. I pulled out a pen and scrawled 'Happy Birthday Lulu Whoopee!' I added a big sour face. … 'I reject this.'" I would certainly call that child abuse, although I suppose Chua would call it "parenting"? To coerce Lulu into piano practice, Chua prevented her from using the washroom, and withheld food and affection until she could perform to her mother's satisfaction. That would qualify as abuse according the Adverse Childhood Experience Study. A lot of child abuse is rationalized by the perpetrator as just "strictness".

cubix 16y ago

"Lulu handed me her 'surprise', which turned out to be a card," writes Chua in her explosive new memoir... "More accurately, it was a piece of paper folded crookedly in half, with a big happy face on the front. Inside, 'Happy Birthday, Mummy! Love, Lulu' was scrawled in crayon above another happy face. I gave the card back to Lulu. 'I don't want this,' I said. 'I want a better one – one that you've put some thought and effort into. I have a special box, where I keep all my cards from you and Sophia, and this one can't go in there.' I grabbed the card again and flipped it over. I pulled out a pen and scrawled 'Happy Birthday Lulu Whoopee!' I added a big sour face. … 'I reject this.'" I would certainly call that child abuse, although I suppose Chua would call it "parenting"? To coerce Lulu into piano practice, Chua prevented her from using the washroom, and withheld food and affection until she could perform to her mother's satisfaction. That would qualify as abuse according the Adverse Childhood Experience Study. A lot of child abuse is rationalized by the perpetrator as just "strictness".