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Re: 6 It much easier to change behaviour that you initiate, than it is to change reactive behaviour. As an example, I tend to use 'yeah, but ...' a lot: I tend
by Confusion 16y ago
Re: 6
It much easier to change behaviour that you initiate, than it is to change reactive behaviour. As an example, I tend to use 'yeah, but ...' a lot: I tend to pose questions as challenges. This does not work well with everyone and I would like to interact with those people differently. However, the 'Yeah, but ...' is so ingrained in my way of discussing proposals that it has proven quite hard to change it. Even though I really, really want to, because some people near to me don't respond well to that way of discussing something obviously unfinished.
- Mz 16y agoFWIW: I was bedridden for about 3.5 months and then was mostly housebound for a long time. During that time, I spent a lot of time on the internet. Getting a job, at a large company no less, after so much physical isolation and mostly interacting online was really bizarre. It is very clear to me that it is a lot harder to not be reactive in person. I think it has to do with things like pheromones. I have found that putting a little more physical distance between myself and others can help reduce that effect. And some people do more "broadcasting" than others, so some individuals are just harder to not be reactive with. I guess developing better habits with other folks (who are easier to deal with) would be a good place to start so that those new habits have some hope of overriding your old habits. It also helps to not be on any medication (even OTC cold meds and such), not hopped up on caffeine, not suffering blood sugar spikes or lows, etc.