I understand your perspective because I've been there but you can always start taking responsibility for codependence now by taking a hard look at how you place

I understand your perspective because I've been there but you can always start taking responsibility for codependence now by taking a hard look at how you place blame (regardless of your gender). In most cases, both parties will contribute to the problem but someone needs to lead themselves and their partner out of the complementary neurosis and you do that by taking responsibility for your contribution then setting boundaries and working compassionately with the other person/people. I don't even think it's people generally who are victims. I don't like victim mentality because it robs "the victim" of agency.