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The article states 18% of men had no close friends, significantly higher than women at 12%. Honestly that’s doesn’t sound hugely different to me. For every two
by throwaway66920 7y ago
The article states 18% of men had no close friends, significantly higher than women at 12%. Honestly that’s doesn’t sound hugely different to me. For every two women with none, there’s three men with none. The gap is a bit smaller for best friends too.
- daenz 7y ago>The gap is a bit smaller for best friends too. It's not: 32% for men, 24% for women. Also, this attitude is why "men are the disposable gender" is a thing. Real problems that are correlated with men are dismissed and ignored as not significant.
- deleted 7y ago[deleted]
- deleted 7y ago[deleted]
- throwaway66920 7y agoIt’s not that significant though. For every 4 men with no best friend there are 3 women in the same position. If being a man is so difficult, this is a small part of it relative to being a woman; and I would wager that women do better here simply because they put in more effort.
- daenz 7y agoAcknowledging a real problem facing men is not the same as claiming "being a man is so difficult," and you immediately jumping to that conclusion makes me question your motives.
- throwaway66920 7y agoI don’t know what ulterior motives I could have in pointing out that something is not a man problem but a people problem.
- pb7 7y agoDo you also dismiss the assertion that women make 75% of the wage men do solely because men put in more effort? By your own words, this should also not be significant but many people would argue the opposite.
- throwaway66920 7y agoThat... isn’t true. Men are not x% more productive across the board, nor do they put in y% more effort across the board. If you disagree with the premise that women put more effort into social relationships be my guest. But there’s another aspect at play here whereby your friends are largely chosen by you whereas your salary is chosen for you. They’re not the same.
- ericmcer 7y agoCould this also have something to do with how men define “close” vs women? Women are better at being emotionally vulnerable with friends so they may be able to obtain a deeper relationship faster. Co-workers and gym buddy’s might be considered close friends by women whereas they will never crack surface level interactions for men.
- Consultant32452 7y agoImagine if it were pay. Women only get 66% of the loneliness men get. This is a national crisis and I demand equality for women.
- ben_jones 7y agoOur society does seem to value pay > a lack of loneliness. Who here would go into total isolation for a large enough paycheck?
- Consultant32452 7y agoTotal isolation is literal torture and is why we should discontinue solitary confinement in our prison system. That fact is relevant to this discussion, we're only talking about a matter of degree.
- nitrogen 7y agoIsn't that sort of what going solo on a startup is trying to do?
- heavenlyblue 7y agoWell, no - it’s more like “women get 88/82th the socialisation men get”.
- throwaway66920 7y agoPay is not the same for a variety of reasons. You have one employer, you have infinite potential friends. Pay concerns are also normalized to things like your job, your education, and experience. If men have fewer friends then must be because they don’t know how to make new friends, they don’t put in the effort to make new friends, or they don’t have the time to make new friends. While the latter may be a genuine concern, women are almost certainly likely to have less spare time due to the various societal requirements on them. So it’s probably a mix of the first two.
- ivalm 7y agoOr because societal norms arent conducive to forming new male friendships?