> So you're saying that you never have anything going on in your head that you didn't choose? No uncomfortable thoughts that you have to push away? No egos lash

> So you're saying that you never have anything going on in your head that you didn't choose? No uncomfortable thoughts that you have to push away? No egos lashing out at other people or telling you you're not good enough? Thanks for putting it this way. I definitely remember my brain used to do stuff like that, when I was a teenager, but it is not a state I can deeply relate to decades later. I recall making a conscious decision, around the time I was 19, to not get hung up on that stuff because it was not pragmatically useful to my physical life. So perhaps I have put some effort into "getting there" and it was just so long ago I've forgotten what it was like.