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Ask HN: How to get people to tell you their problems?
YCombinator, Startup School, etc. all discuss working through issues with potential customers. Asking them about their problems.
How do you start that conversation? Because it seems rather difficult to get just some random person to tell you their problems at work or at home.
- mindcrime 7y agoFirst of all, this is a huge topic, about which entire books could be written. And, in fact, entire books have been written on this topic. So don't expect anything approaching a comprehensive treatment in a post here. That said... start with empathy. Put yourself in your prospects shoes, so to speak. Think about the things you will talk about with someone you don't know, the things you won't, and why they differ. Further consider how you decide who you will and won't talk about certain things with. Example: let's say you're a guy and you have ED. Most guys consider this incredibly embarrassing and wouldn't talk about it with many people. You might even be reluctant to tell your doctor. But you probably would, eventually. OTOH, you might be sitting at a bar, have a stranger sit down next to you who asks "how's it going", and then you blurt out "Ah, hell, my dick doesn't work, the transmission in my car is shot, and my dog died. How about you?" So, why would you tell your doctor about your embarrassing condition? Probably because your doctor has massive credibility in your eyes and represents a source of a resolution to your problem. But why tell the stranger in the bar? He/she can't help right? Maybe not, but since they are a total stranger that you'll probably never see again, you can safely tell them without caring one whit about their judgment of your condition. So, maybe demonstrating credibility and a non-judgmental attitude are keys to getting people to talk about things? Granted, this is an over-simplified example, but think through some similar scenarios and see where it leads you. Regarding credibility: a lot of this is tied up in the research you've already done (you did do preliminary research, right?) related to your prospect (in terms of industry vertical, demographics, geography, etc.), and the questions you ask. Asking good questions is a good way to demonstrate that you know what you're talking about and may represent - as your doctor does - a viable source to some mitigation of the problem at hand. Beyond that: many/most books written on the topic of selling and sales cover this ground to varying degrees. Search the HN archives for the (many) threads on "sales book recommendations" and peruse some of the titles. There are also a lot of books written to target consultants or would-be consultants that deal with similar material.
- sloaken 7y agoGreat answers. The Judgement thing can be seen when you are at a conference or training and they say "there are no dumb questions". Personally I like to respond with "What is the capital of <obscure state or country>". Gets a nice laugh every time.
- mindcrime 7y agoRespect and trust are also important, and kinda relate back to the "non judgmental" part. If you ask somebody a question that pre-supposes that they made a mistake, or are stupid, or don't know their own industry, etc., then that person is probably going to react in a very defensive fashion and put up walls to avoid talking to you. You have to show people that you respect them, and that they can trust you to treat them with respect and dignity, and not belittle or demean them. There's an idea that pickup artists talk about, called "enter her world". The notion goes something like this: if you're out at a bar, and you're a guy, and you see an attractive woman you want to talk to, you approach her and start a conversation, at which point you're just "another sleazy guy in a bar". But if you quickly demonstrate, using your questions, statements, stories, etc., that you have some understanding of the woman's world, the issues she has to deal with, etc., then you can "enter her world" and now you're not just "a sleazy guy at a bar". Now the barriers go down a little bit and the conversation becomes more personal, and more meaningful. OK, it's not a perfect analogy, but you can probably see the connection. The point is basically that you have to earn admission into someone's world if you want them to talk about things beyond a superficial level.
- Porthos9K 7y agoI have the opposite problem. I avoid human interaction because I haven't figured out how to get people to stop talking to me about their problems.
- shyphyzicist 7y agoyeah, me too - be careful what you wish for. some things you can't forget.
- quickthrower2 7y agoAre they problems they’d pay you to fix?
- Porthos9K 7y agoThey don't pay me enough to listen, let alone provide fixes.
- tmaly 7y agoGetting really good at conversation helps. Two books I would recommend are How to Win Friends and Influence People And The Mom Test
- interactivecode 7y agoI have a background in UX before diving into programming. And the simple answer is just to talk to people and then ask in a friendly way. How you start the conversation doesn’t matter much at the start. As long as it isn’t off putting people are quite friendly. I found it always help to explain your goal/project your working on. Starting the conversation with: “Hi I’m working on a fun project and wanted to get out and talk to some people about it. Do you have some time to help me?” After doing this with 30 people in your social circle, slowly start reading up and improving your approach and start asking people further away from you
- tomcam 7y agoI don't make these pronouncements often, but what you need to know is settled science ;) If you read then actually follow "The Mom Test" you'll get the answers you need. To me it's one of the most revolutionary books in business and should be required reading for anyone doing a startup. No relation to the author, I don't make money off the recommendation, etc.