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The biggest factor in America's high divorce rates is, by far, the advent of no-fault divorce starting in the 70s. I think there's also something to the cultur

The biggest factor in America's high divorce rates is, by far, the advent of no-fault divorce starting in the 70s. I think there's also something to the cultural tropes and propaganda we've seen since then portraying marriage as dull, monotonous, and oppressive while lifting up devoting one's life to an office job, travel, and 'exciting' flings as the path to self-fulfillment. When nothing could really be further from the truth - there's a reason millennials and gen-zers are horribly depressed and dying enough deaths of despair from drugs and suicide to bring down the average lifespan.

SketchySeaBeast 7y ago
> there's a reason millennials and gen-zers are horribly depressed and dying enough deaths of despair from drugs and suicide to bring down the average lifespan. Are you saying marriage is happiness? I was cohabitating with my partner for 5 years before we married. There was really no difference in quality of life.
- alfromspace 7y ago
  Not necessarily. I'm more criticizing the alternatives I mentioned. And more broadly their lack of stable relationships, either with romantic partners or families.
dr_dshiv 7y ago
"Marriage is miserable. But not as bad as divorce or never getting married." Is that the idea?
- alfromspace 7y ago
  Why is marriage miserable? Maybe it wouldn't be if people hadn't been conditioned to seek the next dopamine hit instead of trying to make it work.
- strikelaserclaw 7y ago
  The order goes 1)Happy marriage 2)Being Single 3)Shitty marriage
  - dr_dshiv 7y ago
    Hmm. I thought marriage was fundamentally miserable but still better than the alternatives. Actually, please don't disrupt my worldview, thanks k bye.
mikeash 7y ago
If so, that seems to reveal a pent-up desire for divorce that was suppressed by making it legally difficult. Having the government force people to stay together when they don’t want it seems like a bad thing.
icebraining 7y ago
According to Gallup[1], the vast majority of millennials expressed the desire to get married, so the propaganda/trope reasoning seems poorly supported to me. [1] https://news.gallup.com/poll/163802/marriage-importance-dropped.aspx https://news.gallup.com/poll/163802/marriage-importance-drop...
- alfromspace 7y ago
  It could be - but it's also important to note that number is lower than it's ever been, not many do succeed in getting married, and only 14% of respondents had financial reasons for not being married. I think there's a lot to do with the modern zeitgeist in the "too young/not ready" and "looking for the right person" categories.

SketchySeaBeast 7y ago

> there's a reason millennials and gen-zers are horribly depressed and dying enough deaths of despair from drugs and suicide to bring down the average lifespan. Are you saying marriage is happiness? I was cohabitating with my partner for 5 years before we married. There was really no difference in quality of life.

alfromspace 7y ago
Not necessarily. I'm more criticizing the alternatives I mentioned. And more broadly their lack of stable relationships, either with romantic partners or families.

dr_dshiv 7y ago

"Marriage is miserable. But not as bad as divorce or never getting married." Is that the idea?

alfromspace 7y ago
Why is marriage miserable? Maybe it wouldn't be if people hadn't been conditioned to seek the next dopamine hit instead of trying to make it work.
strikelaserclaw 7y ago
The order goes 1)Happy marriage 2)Being Single 3)Shitty marriage
- dr_dshiv 7y ago
  Hmm. I thought marriage was fundamentally miserable but still better than the alternatives. Actually, please don't disrupt my worldview, thanks k bye.

mikeash 7y ago

If so, that seems to reveal a pent-up desire for divorce that was suppressed by making it legally difficult. Having the government force people to stay together when they don’t want it seems like a bad thing.

icebraining 7y ago

According to Gallup[1], the vast majority of millennials expressed the desire to get married, so the propaganda/trope reasoning seems poorly supported to me. [1] https://news.gallup.com/poll/163802/marriage-importance-dropped.aspx https://news.gallup.com/poll/163802/marriage-importance-drop...

alfromspace 7y ago
It could be - but it's also important to note that number is lower than it's ever been, not many do succeed in getting married, and only 14% of respondents had financial reasons for not being married. I think there's a lot to do with the modern zeitgeist in the "too young/not ready" and "looking for the right person" categories.