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The friendliness of a pair of eyes depends quite a bit on the context. This culture seems quite potent in (German-speaking) Switzerland as well, but at least as

The friendliness of a pair of eyes depends quite a bit on the context. This culture seems quite potent in (German-speaking) Switzerland as well, but at least as a visible minority I seem to experience far more less-than-kind stares that wouldn't be acceptable in the US or the UK, for instance. Giving people license to stare can certainly make others feel like they don't belong when it's indiscriminately applied.

stagas 7y ago
I'm visibly not German as well, so I understand what you are saying. Though, I believe it is better than non-looking cultures, because now that they are looking I have the chance to portray the image of who I am, which is a non-hostile, open and warm person that I believe to be, and most of the time this non-verbal communication is picked up by the person staring and I get an attitude shift that corresponds to my attitude. If you immediately feel threatened by the stare, that will be displayed on you, and that will make others look at you even more cautiously. It is not the staring the problem, it is the solution. It is a body language and it can be used collectively for acknowledging who is fit and who is not for the community and also a non-violent ostracization when that one feels so uncomfortable that flees. In a non-staring culture, people never get a chance to read you, they simply glimpse and then immediately make a judgement based on their own presuppositions and then treat you as such. Not in Germany, they will stare until they understand.
itronitron 7y ago
They are probably trying to figure out where you are from. As an American with Norman and Germanic ancestry I get stared at periodically when shopping, and I think they are trying to figure out what is off about me. I definitely do not perceive it as friendly or welcoming in any way. What is unique about the Germanic stare down is there is no effort made on the part of the starer to avert their gaze or even acknowledge that they are staring. Walking towards the starer usually encourages them to turn away.
- stagas 7y ago
  People will always try to figure you out. But with the German stare this communication is enhanced, you get feedback on their feelings for you and you can respond to that with your attitude. In other cultures, they make a judgement and there is nothing more to be done, they close down. In Germany this channel of communication and feedback stays open and works, in my experience, collectively. Once you develop an attitude that works that stops the ugly stares in the grocery, then stares become less threatening in general, collectively. It does seem to be a kind of a super-organism behavior that isn't very well understood, which is why I find it fascinating.

stagas 7y ago

I'm visibly not German as well, so I understand what you are saying. Though, I believe it is better than non-looking cultures, because now that they are looking I have the chance to portray the image of who I am, which is a non-hostile, open and warm person that I believe to be, and most of the time this non-verbal communication is picked up by the person staring and I get an attitude shift that corresponds to my attitude. If you immediately feel threatened by the stare, that will be displayed on you, and that will make others look at you even more cautiously. It is not the staring the problem, it is the solution. It is a body language and it can be used collectively for acknowledging who is fit and who is not for the community and also a non-violent ostracization when that one feels so uncomfortable that flees. In a non-staring culture, people never get a chance to read you, they simply glimpse and then immediately make a judgement based on their own presuppositions and then treat you as such. Not in Germany, they will stare until they understand.

itronitron 7y ago

They are probably trying to figure out where you are from. As an American with Norman and Germanic ancestry I get stared at periodically when shopping, and I think they are trying to figure out what is off about me. I definitely do not perceive it as friendly or welcoming in any way. What is unique about the Germanic stare down is there is no effort made on the part of the starer to avert their gaze or even acknowledge that they are staring. Walking towards the starer usually encourages them to turn away.

stagas 7y ago
People will always try to figure you out. But with the German stare this communication is enhanced, you get feedback on their feelings for you and you can respond to that with your attitude. In other cultures, they make a judgement and there is nothing more to be done, they close down. In Germany this channel of communication and feedback stays open and works, in my experience, collectively. Once you develop an attitude that works that stops the ugly stares in the grocery, then stares become less threatening in general, collectively. It does seem to be a kind of a super-organism behavior that isn't very well understood, which is why I find it fascinating.