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I am chinese and grew up in a strict household when it came to academics, but what a bunch of ego-stroking crap written in that article. I am thankful that my
by ookblah 16y ago
I am chinese and grew up in a strict household when it came to academics, but what a bunch of ego-stroking crap written in that article. I am thankful that my mother would push me and for not letting me always take the easy way out, but there are many times when it was overboard in an unhealthy way.
For one, it creates a limited view of what "success" is and the means to achieve it. My parents had a big fixation on "financial stability" and pushed that on my sister and me. That meant a lot of careers weren't even considered, and music and any other extra-curricular activities were just to make you seem more "rounded".
Growing up I would always be compared to other people. To my sister (she was more the straight-A student, I was the "if this doesn't interest me who cares" type), to other chinese friends. I think it's interesting to fast forward 10 years later and see what effect if any it had on us. The funny thing is that we are all across the board.
The "straight-A, 1600 SAT score student that went to Harvard" that we were always compared to? Most just ended up in successful professions like doctor or lawyer (and I became an engineer haha). Just like their less strict, "western" counter-parts. Nothing against hard work and success, but the way my mom would go on about it back then it was like they were about to win the nobel prize or something and I was gonna be a deadbeat in the streets. The funny thing is my mom looks at it now and realizes how absurd it kind of was.
Some of my friends were not as lucky, and I had a few completely shutdown/rebel in college because they realized they didn't want to live their life dictated by parents or took advantage of their freedom in an unhealthy way. I think there are some good things to take away from this, but "superior"? Please.
Wow, I wrote a lot haha.
- vamsee 16y agoI'm from a similarly "Indian" background, and I should admit reading this article was nauseating. I know the zombie people this kind of approach makes with no identity of their own, and it's nothing to be proud of. I have a question - so how many of these kids with "Chinese" way of raising are leaders in their industry? If they excelled all through their academics, does this mean they'll excel in real life too? Will they have the same kind of linear challenges that an academic setting offers?
- ookblah 16y agoEven going from college -> work it's clear that your high school/college achievements mean jack after some work experience. I've seen (and personally experienced) a few people "wise up" in college/entering the workforce and excel in their fields afterward, even if they did poorly growing up. My opinion is that this type of upbringing tends to produce kids that excel at what they do in their respective fields, but no guarantee that it produces a leader. It also ends up like you described, "zombie people" where everybody that's asian tends to be in health, law, or engineering or a "safer" industry hahaha. For instance, my co-founder and I having entered the startup space, note a lack of Chinese people in this space (like founders), but a ton in general software development roles.
- bps4484 16y ago"Some of my friends were not as lucky, and I had a few completely shutdown/rebel in college because they realized they didn't want to live their life dictated by parents or took advantage of their freedom in an unhealthy way." I went to an engineering school and I observed a lot of this. A lot of kids get to college for the work force and when the gun gets taken away from their head don't have the motivation they once did.