I disagree, or at least my experience on private servers hasn't been this. Putting a group together in chat and getting everyone to the instance takes time and

I disagree, or at least my experience on private servers hasn't been this. Putting a group together in chat and getting everyone to the instance takes time and work yes, but that generally means you don't bail at the first wipe. It might not work that way with new players coming in to classic, but making it trivially easy to group and port to an instance has its own problems.