I think this illustrates quite clearly why "toxic masculinity", even when applied in a well-intentioned manner, is such a problematic term. Because the main par

I think this illustrates quite clearly why "toxic masculinity", even when applied in a well-intentioned manner, is such a problematic term. Because the main part of the problem you're trying to describe (at least in your case) is in fact located _outside_ of the persons that appear to be described by the term. I.e. is it the state of acting assertive, confident and not showing weakness, uncertainty or sorrow that is toxic masculinity? Because many do it mostly because they otherwise (legitimately) fear to be rejected or judged by others for it, often by heterosexual women. But the term sounds like it's a judgement on the man holding these traits, perhaps destructively. Not the world around them that expects or demands this behavior. (Not to mention that it's very easy to conflate some of these traits with personality traits that most would consider to be good or at the very least empirically useful, regardless of gender. E.g. confidence, non-agreeableness, the ability to think on your feet and look after your own interests in a negotiation, physical strength and so on). Wouldn't "destructive gendered behavior expectations" or something like that be both more accurate, useful and palatable?