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>I’d rather be earning a large dollar amount (doing something I enjoy) than child-rearing, even if I had to hire a nanny. Just not something I’m interested in d

>I’d rather be earning a large dollar amount (doing something I enjoy) than child-rearing, even if I had to hire a nanny. Just not something I’m interested in doing full time, and life is too short to do things you don’t want to do if you have the means. I apologise if this infers offence but the way that this reads is that you're not interested in child-rearing so one must ask the question that begs: "Is there a point in having children if you've no interest in their upbringing?"

michaelt 7y ago
Same reason men serving in the military or working abroad or on oil rigs or in long-haul trucking have children?
- maxheadroom 7y ago
  >Same reason men serving in the military or working abroad or on oil rigs or in long-haul trucking have children? I don't see how those two situations equate. One is an impossibility, due to circumstance (e.g.: on the battlefield), and other is the willful knowledge that you want nothing to do with their upbringing because, using the OC's words, "I’d rather be earning a large dollar amount (doing something I enjoy) than child-rearing...". Edit: In other words, there's no direct implication that everyone in the military, working abroad, or long-haul trucking wants nothing to do with child-raising. I'd imagine the situation is actually the inverse but the economic necessity for that work to be done (to provide a living) is what prevents that.
  - michaelt 7y ago
    The equivocation I'm making is although it's unusual, it's far from unprecedented for a parent to make career choices that don't maximise time spent raising their children. If you don't like those examples, consider a family with two busy working parents sending their child to boarding school. If they can afford a boarding school, they've got plenty of income. One or both of them could simply switch to a normal 9-5 job. toomuchtodo would not be the first person to hand their child off for others to deal with, even if the decision to do so is hard for most people to understand :)
deleted 7y ago
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toomuchtodo 7y ago
> "Is there a point in having children if you've no interest in their upbringing?" It makes my partner happy, and as I said, I don't want to do it full time. I still make an active effort raising them when I'm not working my day job (mornings, nights, weekends).
cloverich 7y ago
There is a large gap between not wanting to do it full time and not wanting to do it at all. I"m certainly in the former camp, and as opposed to OP my wife makes more money than me, so it would make even more sense. But I know I would be unhappy doing it _full_ time. To the point, I would not take a job that did not afford me morning, evening, weekend, and occasional PT time to spend with my kids. I enjoy being heavily involved in their day to day rearing. I just don't want to abandon my (enjoyable) career if its not necessary.

michaelt 7y ago

Same reason men serving in the military or working abroad or on oil rigs or in long-haul trucking have children?

maxheadroom 7y ago
>Same reason men serving in the military or working abroad or on oil rigs or in long-haul trucking have children? I don't see how those two situations equate. One is an impossibility, due to circumstance (e.g.: on the battlefield), and other is the willful knowledge that you want nothing to do with their upbringing because, using the OC's words, "I’d rather be earning a large dollar amount (doing something I enjoy) than child-rearing...". Edit: In other words, there's no direct implication that everyone in the military, working abroad, or long-haul trucking wants nothing to do with child-raising. I'd imagine the situation is actually the inverse but the economic necessity for that work to be done (to provide a living) is what prevents that.
- michaelt 7y ago
  The equivocation I'm making is although it's unusual, it's far from unprecedented for a parent to make career choices that don't maximise time spent raising their children. If you don't like those examples, consider a family with two busy working parents sending their child to boarding school. If they can afford a boarding school, they've got plenty of income. One or both of them could simply switch to a normal 9-5 job. toomuchtodo would not be the first person to hand their child off for others to deal with, even if the decision to do so is hard for most people to understand :)

deleted 7y ago

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toomuchtodo 7y ago

> "Is there a point in having children if you've no interest in their upbringing?" It makes my partner happy, and as I said, I don't want to do it full time. I still make an active effort raising them when I'm not working my day job (mornings, nights, weekends).

cloverich 7y ago

There is a large gap between not wanting to do it full time and not wanting to do it at all. I"m certainly in the former camp, and as opposed to OP my wife makes more money than me, so it would make even more sense. But I know I would be unhappy doing it _full_ time. To the point, I would not take a job that did not afford me morning, evening, weekend, and occasional PT time to spend with my kids. I enjoy being heavily involved in their day to day rearing. I just don't want to abandon my (enjoyable) career if its not necessary.