Honestly, when I read both versions of the e-mail, I liked the original better. It's not that I disagree with the author's recommendations, it's just that I thi

Honestly, when I read both versions of the e-mail, I liked the original better. It's not that I disagree with the author's recommendations, it's just that I think his execution didn't work too well with this particular example. I'm not 100% sure what made me come away with that impression. I think he overdid the "make every character matter" part. For example, I intensely disliked the "and because we love you!" bit. Also, "Hi there" seems to me less fake than "Hello Friend". To top it off, the fourth step -- "Start to see the power of word to mouth marketing! " -- is yet another irritating, thinly veiled attempt to persuade me to "buy"; after all, either I truly participated in the beta and therefore I know what the site is about, or I didn't because I found out I didn't care. All in all, I like the advice, but the example ended up being a counter-example.