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If having children is so wonderful one must wonder why men still haven’t by large decided to pitch in when it comes to the nuts and bolts of child rearing. Whil

If having children is so wonderful one must wonder why men still haven’t by large decided to pitch in when it comes to the nuts and bolts of child rearing. While I would agree that any vocational claim of making the world a better place is dubious, certainly that is equally true if not more so of bringing more people into the world.

AnthonyMouse 7y ago
> If having children is so wonderful one must wonder why men still haven’t by large decided to pitch in when it comes to the nuts and bolts of child rearing. It's, by and large, because those are not the men that women select to have children with. When women consistently choose the man with the six figure salary, but that implies working long hours, what follows is predictable. There is also a high degree of adverse selection there because a woman can't tell how much a man will help with the children before she has the children, by which point the father is already chosen. So they choose based on what they do know (e.g. salary) which is inversely correlated with that.
- dnjdrbdhdbs 7y ago
  Bingo. I was on the kind of career trajectory for a million dollar salary. The most famous school, name brand employers, etc. But when we had a kid I fell in love and I wanted to spend tons of time with him. It’s my wife who had to be OK with moving out of the Bay Area, cutting our expenses, while I transitioned to a job where I basically work 5 hours a day and make less than $200K. Most wives would have said no fucking way. We are going to have more kids and I may even go full stay at home dad.
belorn 7y ago
Incentive models are usually very easily explained by comparing groups that take either road A or road B and see the results. If we look at top 50% highest earners among men and compare with the bottom 50%, who has: Highest Social status. Has more children. Bigger social support system. Live longer. Better health. Feeling of happiness and fulfillment. For comparison do the same with women and take the top and bottom 50% and collect the same data. From this simple data driven study we can prove if there exist an incentive in the form of pure outcomes between focusing on activities that raise income compared to activities of social value but without any monetary rewards. We also get a gendered perspective on the question.
scooble 7y ago
I suspect this is a bit like people in the 50s asking why, if having a career is so great, have women still not decided to pitch in and club the corporate ladder.

AnthonyMouse 7y ago

> If having children is so wonderful one must wonder why men still haven’t by large decided to pitch in when it comes to the nuts and bolts of child rearing. It's, by and large, because those are not the men that women select to have children with. When women consistently choose the man with the six figure salary, but that implies working long hours, what follows is predictable. There is also a high degree of adverse selection there because a woman can't tell how much a man will help with the children before she has the children, by which point the father is already chosen. So they choose based on what they do know (e.g. salary) which is inversely correlated with that.

dnjdrbdhdbs 7y ago
Bingo. I was on the kind of career trajectory for a million dollar salary. The most famous school, name brand employers, etc. But when we had a kid I fell in love and I wanted to spend tons of time with him. It’s my wife who had to be OK with moving out of the Bay Area, cutting our expenses, while I transitioned to a job where I basically work 5 hours a day and make less than $200K. Most wives would have said no fucking way. We are going to have more kids and I may even go full stay at home dad.

belorn 7y ago

Incentive models are usually very easily explained by comparing groups that take either road A or road B and see the results. If we look at top 50% highest earners among men and compare with the bottom 50%, who has: Highest Social status. Has more children. Bigger social support system. Live longer. Better health. Feeling of happiness and fulfillment. For comparison do the same with women and take the top and bottom 50% and collect the same data. From this simple data driven study we can prove if there exist an incentive in the form of pure outcomes between focusing on activities that raise income compared to activities of social value but without any monetary rewards. We also get a gendered perspective on the question.

scooble 7y ago

I suspect this is a bit like people in the 50s asking why, if having a career is so great, have women still not decided to pitch in and club the corporate ladder.