4 ms·

You really can speak with children who aren't yours. Some parents will probably be upset or offended no matter how you approach, well tough luck for them. I t

You really can speak with children who aren't yours. Some parents will probably be upset or offended no matter how you approach, well tough luck for them. I think most parents will be shamed as an initial response but the key is your delivery. Don't be a jerk of adult. The child likely does not understand the consequences of kicking on a seat. Explain to the child that you can feel it and that it bothers or hurts you, it may make more impact than routing feedback through the parents. It may not work. It may take some reiteration. The parents may politely explain a learning disability in which you just engage with them. The parents may give you a stinkeye. Oh well, kids need to learn how to interact with the rest of their world, and the parents who you seem to be most worried about are probably the ones whose kids need it the most. Usually I find that parents are reasonable and appreciate other adults treating their children like small, learning humans rather than tiny monsters.

magduf 7y ago
>Usually I find that parents are reasonable and appreciate other adults treating their children like small, learning humans rather than tiny monsters. Maybe they should stop allowing their children to behave like tiny monsters. This just isn't a problem in many other cultures; you don't see children in Japan act like that. This is mostly an American phenomenon because people forgot how to be good parents in this society.
- sidlls 7y ago
  Children from countries other than America exhibit poor behavior. That's what children do, because they lack the structures and connections in their brains that adults have that provide us the ability to comport ourselves the way we do.
  - magduf 7y ago
    They aren't as bad as American children, because in other cultures they're taught from an early age how to behave appropriately around other people. In America, parents think their kids are special snowflakes and should never be disciplined, so bad behavior is rampant. The culture in America really is different from other places, as much as you might refuse to believe this. As for "structures and connections", that's a ridiculous excuse. Sure, when children are infants you can make that excuse because they're really too young to learn almost anything. We're talking about kids that are 5-10 years old here. Differing upbringing doesn't somehow magically take effect only at age 18.
jessaustin 7y ago
I don't care about the proper socialization of some random kid on a plane. That is not my job. That is a parent's job. As others have indicated, parents probably have a better understanding of the kid's special problems than I do. The point is not that we're going to solve this problem, of kids being unruly and parents saving their efforts for other priorities. If I didn't pay for first class, I can tolerate a couple hours of annoyance. The point was a far smaller one, that writing off poor public behavior as "well, autism is increasingly common now" is a pathetic cop-out, which does no favors for those who are actually autistic.

magduf 7y ago

>Usually I find that parents are reasonable and appreciate other adults treating their children like small, learning humans rather than tiny monsters. Maybe they should stop allowing their children to behave like tiny monsters. This just isn't a problem in many other cultures; you don't see children in Japan act like that. This is mostly an American phenomenon because people forgot how to be good parents in this society.

sidlls 7y ago
Children from countries other than America exhibit poor behavior. That's what children do, because they lack the structures and connections in their brains that adults have that provide us the ability to comport ourselves the way we do.
- magduf 7y ago
  They aren't as bad as American children, because in other cultures they're taught from an early age how to behave appropriately around other people. In America, parents think their kids are special snowflakes and should never be disciplined, so bad behavior is rampant. The culture in America really is different from other places, as much as you might refuse to believe this. As for "structures and connections", that's a ridiculous excuse. Sure, when children are infants you can make that excuse because they're really too young to learn almost anything. We're talking about kids that are 5-10 years old here. Differing upbringing doesn't somehow magically take effect only at age 18.

jessaustin 7y ago

I don't care about the proper socialization of some random kid on a plane. That is not my job. That is a parent's job. As others have indicated, parents probably have a better understanding of the kid's special problems than I do. The point is not that we're going to solve this problem, of kids being unruly and parents saving their efforts for other priorities. If I didn't pay for first class, I can tolerate a couple hours of annoyance. The point was a far smaller one, that writing off poor public behavior as "well, autism is increasingly common now" is a pathetic cop-out, which does no favors for those who are actually autistic.