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Success is surprisingly fun. However, allow me to make a distinction. For a lot of people instead of wishing to do something, they wish to have done something
by mikekchar 7y ago
Success is surprisingly fun. However, allow me to make a distinction. For a lot of people instead of wishing to do something, they wish to have done something. So for example, they may say that they wish to make a lot of money, but actually they want to have made a lot of money. The idea in their head is lounging on the beach with cute waiting staff at their beck and call. However the thing they end up doing is working themselves to the bone making money. It's really important when you set goals for yourself that you understand the distinction. Personally, mostly avoid going after goals in the shape of "to have done something" and rather go after goals of "to do something". If I don't like studying Japanese, then I don't do it and I don't have a goal to have learned Japanese. If I don't like running I don't do it and I don't have a goal to have run a marathon. And if I don't like doing what it takes to make a lot of money, I don't have a goal to have made a lot of money. Those kinds of things are in our ability to choose.
The other strange thing that I found for myself (and I think it's different for different people) is that "goals to have done something" are just not satisfying for me. I get no pleasure from having achieved anything. I only get pleasure achieving things. I love being successful. I'm completely neutral about having been successful.
For me, being successful really truly brings me happiness. I therefore choose to do things where I will likely be successful in a sustainable way.
- hkai 7y agoI came to the comments to learn new ideas and I found one, thank you. Indeed I was wondering why completing tasks is absolutely unsatisfying for me: it's because I wish I would have done them (earlier).
- wishwish 7y agoPerhaps you deny people the right to wish things they will never have? The true thing to know is that most of your dreams will never come true and you should'nt be sad about it. Just to please the hive mind of HN: Don’t aim to be successful — aim to be hardworking https://medium.com/@s.sekulins/the-first-step-to-surpassing-your-limits-and-achieving-your-wildest-dreams-f29056615979 https://medium.com/@s.sekulins/the-first-step-to-surpassing-... https://medium.com/the-ascent/popular-delusion-3-common-and-devastating-lies-we-must-stop-telling-ourselves-c45f830a33c5 https://medium.com/the-ascent/popular-delusion-3-common-and-... https://medium.com/the-ascent/how-to-become-successful-in-3-minutes-92052e3574e5 https://medium.com/the-ascent/how-to-become-successful-in-3-...
- alexpetralia 7y agoThis is a very useful distinction. Thanks!
- NetOpWibby 7y agoI’m sharing this comment with my friends and family, that was thought-provoking and insightful.
- liberte82 7y agoThis is a good way of explaining the old expression, "What matters is the journey, not the destination"
- croh 7y agoAnd if you don't like travelling, don't embark on journey. Problem comes when you want to reach destination and hate travelling.
- croh 7y agoAwesome comment