I agree about "please" coming across as condescending. One way I write around it is to frame discussion in terms of "we" and not "you." I think "we" reinforces

I agree about "please" coming across as condescending. One way I write around it is to frame discussion in terms of "we" and not "you." I think "we" reinforces the collective ownership of the code and de-emphasizes the idea of the review being me vs. you. I wrote more about this technique a couple years ago: https://mtlynch.io/human-code-reviews-1/#never-say-you https://mtlynch.io/human-code-reviews-1/#never-say-you