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I observed three stages in my personal experience: Stage 1: Being the river of emotions In the beginning when emotions arose in my head, I was strongly attach
by jugjug 7y ago
I observed three stages in my personal experience:
Stage 1: Being the river of emotions
In the beginning when emotions arose in my head, I was strongly attached to them. I identified myself with emotions I felt. My internal happiness and inner piece were strongly dependent on emotions I was experiencing. As a consequence, my internal happiness was volatile.
Stage 2: Observing the river of emotions
Through meditation I was able to become an observer of my emotions. Emotions are still present, but I don’t identify myself with them that much. Like an observer watching a river of emotions. I still feel joy, I still get aggravated, but the relationship towards emotions has changed. What’s present is curiosity towards my feelings coupled with a peculiar sense of detachment. It’s a great feature of consciousness to have, IMHO.
I feel more alive, I recognize my emotions more accurately and I think I have become more emphatic. I find myself feeling the present moment in every day common situations (e.g., commute). I can concentrate more on tasks at hand, I’m naturally in the flow. On top of this, my internal happiness has become deeper and constant, as the attachment to my emotions has weakened.
It took me 2-3 years. I experimented with various kinds of meditation (static, dynamic, breathing, etc.) and picked those that I found effective. I started with Headspace, for about a year. Then dynamic osho meditation + qi-gong standing meditations worked great. Also, targeting my attention to how I felt during everyday common activities helped tremendously (what I feel when having an argument, what I feel before a presentation, etc).
Stage 3: Who’s the observer?
Currently, I’m becoming more and more curious about the nature of the observer. Who’s the observer? Who’s feeling a feeling I’m feeling? If Stage 2 is a meta-level of thinking, stage 3 seems like a meta-meta level. I’m curious how that feels like. My hunch is that the internal happiness and calm becomes even more deeper. The question that is burning my consciousness currently is who will be feeling that calm then? :)
It seems to me we live in a world of abundant information and opportunities on cultivating one’s consciousness. I think that advanced levels of consciousness can be reached quickly and effectively, compared to people who lived hundreds of years ago.
Also, it’s a long-term game. I’m currently learning a 60-second free-standing handstand, starting from zero, and I know it’s a project for at least a year. I’m 6 months in. The progress is really really slow and highly non-linear. Sometimes the non-linearity is very discouraging, sometimes very encouraging. Nevertheless, I show up 3 times a week and do my one hour routine. Despite the slowness, I cannot believe my current skills compared to January this year.
If you have any questions, I’m happy to answer.
- HiroshiSan 7y agoI would love to hear more about how you apply your meditation practice to learning a skill. I'm currently learning how to draw, and it's quite different from handstands in that I can't see the progress until after I look back every couple of months, whereas with a handstand I assume you can sort of "feel" the improvement by how balanced you are.
- jugjug 7y agoWhen learning a skill (for me it’s Brazilian jiu-jitsu and Ido Portal movement) I can get into the flow very quickly and stay deeply concentrated for at least two hours. This concentration speeds up learning, in my experience. I notice I don’t get distracted easily. For example, when a teacher stands next to me while I’m doing an exercise. I notice him, a thought arises in my head that he is looking at me. However, I’m not attached to that thought and can continue focusing on the drill at hand. I like this feature. The non-linear nature of learning a skill has become less distracting. When learning isn’t progressing, I notice the thought. Since my internal state is less dependent on emotions, plateaus are less discouraging. It is still discouraging, but much less for me that it used to be. Also, I think my learning itself goes quicker. My hypothesis is that my mind is getting used to non-standard states of consciousness (through meditation), which increases its “flexibility” and adaptability. Learning a new skills, in a sense of directing the mind into new territory (of yet to be learnt material), seems to go quicker. The downside is that I cannot do tasks with 50% focus. I’m either in the flow or I’m not doing anything. This starts to apply to almost any daily activity. I’m slowly getting used to it. Hope this helps.
- HiroshiSan 7y agoYour explanations remind me a lot of Josh Waitzkin, check out his book The Art of Learning or any one of his interviews. I think you will agree with a lot of what he has to say on learning as he approaches it very similarly.
- jugjug 7y agoIndeed, that book influenced me deeply. It helped me to further blend together the meditation practice with the physical/bjj practice. It's among my top three books. I'm happy to see the reference to it here on HN :)