4 ms·

Honest question: is it arrogant or pretentious for me to think those people are stupid? It just seems like such a woeful decision to make. The oily loan sharks

by Bakary 7y ago

Honest question: is it arrogant or pretentious for me to think those people are stupid? It just seems like such a woeful decision to make. The oily loan sharks are indeed partially responsible, but it's like blaming the sharpness of the knife after you stab yourself.

bittercynic 7y ago
It is at least ignorant and dismissive to think that. I've met a few people who face social pressures from their family, who number in the dozens, to do things that appear extremely financially irresponsible from my perspective. If you have to choose between being responsible and not infuriating the 40 most important people in your life, I don't think that would be an easy decision to make. Go against the grain too many times and you risk having the family turn their collective back on you, which might be the best thing financially, but is still a terrifying prospect.
- balfirevic 7y ago
  I think this just illustrates how different social worlds are for different people. For me, having 40 family members (especially the ones whose opinion you'd care about) just sounds made up. And having family members pressure you into things you don't want sounds like a great opportunity to learn how to tell people to mind their own business. Please note, I'm not judging. I can't even mentally put myself in that situation, so how could I judge? But also, it's hard not to notice that if somebody's 40 family members turn their back on them then their life would just become similar to the lives of mostly everyone I know (i.e. having 0-5 family members that care about you and that you care about).
malvosenior 7y ago
No it's not arrogant or pretentious, you're actually helping the situation. People who are easily swayed (aka stupid) might as well encounter some negative societal pressure to not make horrible financial decisions. If more people felt like you, the people who feel peer and media pressured into living beyond their means might think twice about making decisions like this.

by Bakary 7y ago

bittercynic 7y ago

It is at least ignorant and dismissive to think that. I've met a few people who face social pressures from their family, who number in the dozens, to do things that appear extremely financially irresponsible from my perspective. If you have to choose between being responsible and not infuriating the 40 most important people in your life, I don't think that would be an easy decision to make. Go against the grain too many times and you risk having the family turn their collective back on you, which might be the best thing financially, but is still a terrifying prospect.

balfirevic 7y ago
I think this just illustrates how different social worlds are for different people. For me, having 40 family members (especially the ones whose opinion you'd care about) just sounds made up. And having family members pressure you into things you don't want sounds like a great opportunity to learn how to tell people to mind their own business. Please note, I'm not judging. I can't even mentally put myself in that situation, so how could I judge? But also, it's hard not to notice that if somebody's 40 family members turn their back on them then their life would just become similar to the lives of mostly everyone I know (i.e. having 0-5 family members that care about you and that you care about).

malvosenior 7y ago

No it's not arrogant or pretentious, you're actually helping the situation. People who are easily swayed (aka stupid) might as well encounter some negative societal pressure to not make horrible financial decisions. If more people felt like you, the people who feel peer and media pressured into living beyond their means might think twice about making decisions like this.