I was playing the original comments for laughs, but the MH haggadah is want I want out of a haggadah and am I fairly sad that it or something nearly identical d

I was playing the original comments for laughs, but the MH haggadah is want I want out of a haggadah and am I fairly sad that it or something nearly identical doesn't exist anymore. I don't want huge swaths cut out; I like the archaic English (the Hebrew is archaic); I don't want little asides about how the story of the exodus rings true today because it's just like the Jews stuck behind the iron curtain or apartheid South Africa or oppressed racial minorities in the US. I just want more or less the same haggadah that my ancestors used with a translation so I can follow along in a language I understand. If we aren't getting a lot of value out of a discussion of how and an extra comma means one hundred plagues at the red sea, we can choose to skip that part ourselves.