2 ms·

I'm a generalist, I hate specializing and it feels like a curse rather than a triumph. I have reasonable general understanding of a huge spectrum of topics but

I'm a generalist, I hate specializing and it feels like a curse rather than a triumph. I have reasonable general understanding of a huge spectrum of topics but little skill of actually applying most of them. I feel excited about everything and pain about concentrating on a single. Every time I start doing something I feel like I hate doing it instead of learning about something else. The sense of not having enough time to learn everything almost puts me in panic. I tend to attribute this to ADHD. Small doses of desoxyn (meth) help a lot (and nothing else helps) but you can't get it legally outside the US. Every employer wants a specialist and I can't blame them.

wuliwong 7y ago
To me, a generalist is someone who does have skill in application not just knowledge about topics. At least in my world of software engineering for the internet.
natalyarostova 7y ago
It would be really strange if a high dosage of dexedrine didn't at least get you 80-90% of desoxyn.
- qwerty456127 7y ago
  I'll read about it and try to get some to give it a try (never heard of it before). Thanks!
  - qwerty456127 7y ago
    Googled it, it's just dextroamphetamine. 1. you can't get it legally where I live either (concerta-ritalin and a norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor (only gives me anxiety) I can't remember the name of are the only thing doctors can prescribe) 2. I've tried it illegally and it didn't help - it indeed calms me down (feel so serene) and helps to concentrate but... on listening/watching/reading only, not on doing (while desoxyn concentrates me on doing and I stop wanting to learn).
slothtrop 7y ago
It definitely has its drawbacks. There's no enduring satisfaction to specialized positions, likewise jumping between various interests is untenable from a career standpoint. Still, we can indulge in novelty in our own time, or even break the rules at times. The setback I most identify for myself is that it keeps me from investing in "mastering" a domain. The idea itself is attractive, but maybe there's nothing to it except bragging rights. As long as you're always studying something, you're effectively doing the same thing as "mastering".
freeflight 7y ago
> Small doses of desoxyn (meth) help a lot (and nothing else helps) but you can't get it legally outside the US. Be very careful with this. I've been in the same boat but it's not one you can ride forever, the older you get the bigger the physical toll this is gonna take on your body. Consider looking for an alternative that isn't as "hard", cannabis can be that once you found a good strain for you (Sativa weighted hybrids) and a reliable supplier for it. Sadly that's pretty much impossible if you ain't living in a place where it's legalized. Illegal drug suppliers are rarely known for the consistency of their products.
- qwerty456127 7y ago
  Don't worry. I know how to do it the proper way an don't do it anyway. I've once gotten 2 grams of pure crystals rather than pills, done a lot of research (the "limitless" movie inspires to invest in such a research first, reddit and quora are great places to start), experimented a lot (with practices and supplements to take to protect the body from the bad things it does and mitigate tolerance growth) and came to the point when I could marathon for a week without sleeping without even having hangover once I stop. The feelable negative results were (after I've found a proper way) almost none but over-concentration (narrowed mental view), disregulated blood sugar and butt ache caused by 22x7 concentrated working sitting on a chair. Nevertheless I stopped and don't use it and my actual working dose I used on some occasions (but the experiments) to concentrate for hours was almost homeopathic - 3 minuscule sand-like specks a day. I've even helped some addicts to quit gracefully. As for weed (which isn't legal at my location either yet quite easy to get with little or no risk of prosecution - people use to smoke in the streets and cops walking by don't care) I've tried smoking it (in tiny doses, my body is very sensitive to all the substances) regularly for some time but didn't really like it and now I don't even know where to get it (as well as any other illegal substances, the dealers I knew have vanished over time as I was an extremely infrequent buyer and I don't bother to look for new). It made my mind a way less sharp, some strains made me sleepy, some strains made me crazy, the only thing the weed actually was great with for me was sex. If you happen to know particularly good strain names I'd love to know too, however. I once met a guy who offered 9 different strains and I haven't bought any just because I didn't knew which I could like. BTW the only thing other than meth that used to help was 1/4 pill of xanax (especially stacked with sunifiram). But it's almost impossible to get. I was lucky to get 4 pills once so I could take it 12 times and leave a pill for for a rainy day. I've also tried bromozepam but it doesn't do the job for me.
justnotworthit 7y ago
Epstein's book is not for you. His "generalist" is 95x magnification instead of 99x. Look up "Refuse to Choose!" by Barbara Sher. I'm like you and her book(s) taught me that I don't need to feel guilty, self-loath, or suffer insults for being this way.

wuliwong 7y ago

To me, a generalist is someone who does have skill in application not just knowledge about topics. At least in my world of software engineering for the internet.

natalyarostova 7y ago

It would be really strange if a high dosage of dexedrine didn't at least get you 80-90% of desoxyn.

qwerty456127 7y ago
I'll read about it and try to get some to give it a try (never heard of it before). Thanks!
- qwerty456127 7y ago
  Googled it, it's just dextroamphetamine. 1. you can't get it legally where I live either (concerta-ritalin and a norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor (only gives me anxiety) I can't remember the name of are the only thing doctors can prescribe) 2. I've tried it illegally and it didn't help - it indeed calms me down (feel so serene) and helps to concentrate but... on listening/watching/reading only, not on doing (while desoxyn concentrates me on doing and I stop wanting to learn).

slothtrop 7y ago

It definitely has its drawbacks. There's no enduring satisfaction to specialized positions, likewise jumping between various interests is untenable from a career standpoint. Still, we can indulge in novelty in our own time, or even break the rules at times. The setback I most identify for myself is that it keeps me from investing in "mastering" a domain. The idea itself is attractive, but maybe there's nothing to it except bragging rights. As long as you're always studying something, you're effectively doing the same thing as "mastering".

freeflight 7y ago

> Small doses of desoxyn (meth) help a lot (and nothing else helps) but you can't get it legally outside the US. Be very careful with this. I've been in the same boat but it's not one you can ride forever, the older you get the bigger the physical toll this is gonna take on your body. Consider looking for an alternative that isn't as "hard", cannabis can be that once you found a good strain for you (Sativa weighted hybrids) and a reliable supplier for it. Sadly that's pretty much impossible if you ain't living in a place where it's legalized. Illegal drug suppliers are rarely known for the consistency of their products.

qwerty456127 7y ago
Don't worry. I know how to do it the proper way an don't do it anyway. I've once gotten 2 grams of pure crystals rather than pills, done a lot of research (the "limitless" movie inspires to invest in such a research first, reddit and quora are great places to start), experimented a lot (with practices and supplements to take to protect the body from the bad things it does and mitigate tolerance growth) and came to the point when I could marathon for a week without sleeping without even having hangover once I stop. The feelable negative results were (after I've found a proper way) almost none but over-concentration (narrowed mental view), disregulated blood sugar and butt ache caused by 22x7 concentrated working sitting on a chair. Nevertheless I stopped and don't use it and my actual working dose I used on some occasions (but the experiments) to concentrate for hours was almost homeopathic - 3 minuscule sand-like specks a day. I've even helped some addicts to quit gracefully. As for weed (which isn't legal at my location either yet quite easy to get with little or no risk of prosecution - people use to smoke in the streets and cops walking by don't care) I've tried smoking it (in tiny doses, my body is very sensitive to all the substances) regularly for some time but didn't really like it and now I don't even know where to get it (as well as any other illegal substances, the dealers I knew have vanished over time as I was an extremely infrequent buyer and I don't bother to look for new). It made my mind a way less sharp, some strains made me sleepy, some strains made me crazy, the only thing the weed actually was great with for me was sex. If you happen to know particularly good strain names I'd love to know too, however. I once met a guy who offered 9 different strains and I haven't bought any just because I didn't knew which I could like. BTW the only thing other than meth that used to help was 1/4 pill of xanax (especially stacked with sunifiram). But it's almost impossible to get. I was lucky to get 4 pills once so I could take it 12 times and leave a pill for for a rainy day. I've also tried bromozepam but it doesn't do the job for me.

justnotworthit 7y ago

Epstein's book is not for you. His "generalist" is 95x magnification instead of 99x. Look up "Refuse to Choose!" by Barbara Sher. I'm like you and her book(s) taught me that I don't need to feel guilty, self-loath, or suffer insults for being this way.