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I grew up very conservative and very evangelical and left as an adult because I couldn't honestly hold the basic beliefs in an honest way. I was also really ang
by jtr1 7y ago
I grew up very conservative and very evangelical and left as an adult because I couldn't honestly hold the basic beliefs in an honest way. I was also really angry about a bunch of things: the prevalence of narcissism among preachers, authoritarian organizational structures, treatment of women, etc etc - I could give you a whole litany. If you pay any attention to religion in the US, you could probably anticipate much of it.
Years later, not much has changed. The anger has faded, particularly as I watch some of those old churches dying (although not without some degree of satisfaction, I'll admit).
BUT, I do agree that it's widely under-appreciated just how sophisticated a social technology the congregation is. And there's not, as far as I've found, a viable secular alternative. Take away shared conviction about the transcendent and you seem to lose some kind of binding agent, like baking without gluten.
- bigred100 7y agoPretty wacky when many American Christians I meet seem to be more prideful and puffed up than even the atheists, who are often caricatured as very impressed with their own intelligence. So much for “Learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart”
- Apocryphon 7y agoNational chauvinism could be a factor.
- marnett 7y agodo not forget the social cohesive elements like worship. i have strongly believed the church's biggest advantage as a social institution is due to collectively performing some unifying ritual. i think these rituals are instrumental to the social cohesion that is the congregation.
- Broken_Hippo 7y agoBut there isn't social cohesion for folks like me. I'm female. I do not believe in god. I'm bisexual. I am exactly the sort of person left out of worship unless I pretend I'm someone I am not and don't reveal my true self. I'm a fraud if I want to fit in - these groups rarely simply accept me going there for the social aspect.
- jtr1 7y agoI'm sorry, I hope my comment didn't come across as flippant about how the majority of churches treat women, LGBTQ+ people, and others. I'm pretty firmly in the unbeliever category myself and left out of disgust with all the exclusionary practices. I did spend several years in an ELCA church pastored and co-pastored by a woman and by a gay man, who made a point every week of welcoming non-believers to the service. It nuanced my worldview a little bit. They were lovely people, but the congregation was definitely fighting upstream in wider Christian culture. In my mind, the main secular benefit of church (for people who were not excluded) was access to ready-made community, reinforced by a regular meeting space and rituals (like singing) that help people bond and process major life transitions. I've been on the outside for about five years and haven't really found anything that fills that space, although I'm always interested to hear what others have found.