4 ms·

The writing is really odd. "According to the Dansville Historical Society, Jackson would create and use this cereal in his sanitarium in Dansville NY." Well,

by m0nty 7y ago

The writing is really odd. "According to the Dansville Historical Society, Jackson would create and use this cereal in his sanitarium in Dansville NY." Well, did he or didn't he? Why say "would create" when you meant "created"? "In 1878 Jackson would have a visitor to his medical facility, Dr. John Harvey Kellogg" Again ... "These institutions would teach that if you ate a healthy breakfast you could be more productive at work. Of course, that would be an excellent selling feature that would win over converts. Cereal companies would begin to pop up like weeds." I'm not usually so picky, natural voice, etc. But it seems odd to use "would" all the time.

Terretta 7y ago
It’s a verb tense for when your story starts in the more distant past and then describes a future that will come to pass relative to that past. Makes more sense if you add the (unnecessary) additional words “go on to”. Here’s a guy at a past point in time. That guy would go on to create the cereal, and would go on to have a visitor ... Merriam Webster: past future adj. — of, relating to, or constituting a verb tense that is traditionally formed in English with would or should and denotes an action or state as future from a past point of view (as would write in “he promised that he would write”) More: https://www.thoughtco.com/future-in-the-past-grammar-1690811 https://www.thoughtco.com/future-in-the-past-grammar-1690811
- m0nty 7y ago
  > "These institutions would teach that if you ate a healthy breakfast you could be more productive at work. Of course, that would be an excellent selling feature that would win over converts. Cereal companies would begin to pop up like weeds." Why not "These institutions taught that if you ate a healthy breakfast, you would be more productive at work. Of course, that was an excellent selling feature and won over converts. Cereal companies popped up like weeds." I understand the tense being used, I'm just puzzled why anyone would want to use it so much.
ptah 7y ago
possibly a weak attempt at e-prime?
- m0nty 7y ago
  Had to look it up :)

by m0nty 7y ago

Terretta 7y ago

It’s a verb tense for when your story starts in the more distant past and then describes a future that will come to pass relative to that past. Makes more sense if you add the (unnecessary) additional words “go on to”. Here’s a guy at a past point in time. That guy would go on to create the cereal, and would go on to have a visitor ... Merriam Webster: past future adj. — of, relating to, or constituting a verb tense that is traditionally formed in English with would or should and denotes an action or state as future from a past point of view (as would write in “he promised that he would write”) More: https://www.thoughtco.com/future-in-the-past-grammar-1690811 https://www.thoughtco.com/future-in-the-past-grammar-1690811

m0nty 7y ago
> "These institutions would teach that if you ate a healthy breakfast you could be more productive at work. Of course, that would be an excellent selling feature that would win over converts. Cereal companies would begin to pop up like weeds." Why not "These institutions taught that if you ate a healthy breakfast, you would be more productive at work. Of course, that was an excellent selling feature and won over converts. Cereal companies popped up like weeds." I understand the tense being used, I'm just puzzled why anyone would want to use it so much.

ptah 7y ago

possibly a weak attempt at e-prime?

m0nty 7y ago
Had to look it up :)