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Everybody has already made great arguments. I wasn't attacking him, just pointing out that there are personal factors that probably prevent him from seeing the
by jplayer01 7y ago
Everybody has already made great arguments. I wasn't attacking him, just pointing out that there are personal factors that probably prevent him from seeing the other side. That's incredibly important and shouldn't be dismissed. It wasn't meant in any kind of accusatory or inflammatory way.
It's really unnecessary and unproductive for my comment to be flagged. There's something very wrong with this place if nobody is ever allowed without any exception to engage with each other on a more personal level. Sometimes no logical well-thought out reasoned argument will ever convince somebody else, at which point it really helps to try to understand why a person believes the things he does. We're human, not robots. Our beliefs aren't just factual, they're based in our experience, our environment, and who we are.
- dang 7y agoThe first sentence, though personal, arguably managed to stay on the ok side of the line. But when you cross into "you're being so defensive", "it's time you distanced yourself emotionally from the issue", and so on, that's invasive personal commentary which does count as attack/accusatory/inflammatory (to put it in the terms you used). Nobody wants to be psychologized and patronized in this way. Even if your perceptions are accurate, it's the worst way to share them with the other person. I get that that wasn't your intention, but keep in mind that these things come across as much stronger and less innocuous to the reader than they do to the writer. Multiply that by 10x at least when you're the person being targeted. When users make arguments in this way, it nearly always leads to angrier, flamier, discussion, so I do think the flags on the comment are correct.