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> Do you ever feel like these applications are re-enforcing physical gender stereotypes? They do. Even people that are not transgender might get stuck trying t

> Do you ever feel like these applications are re-enforcing physical gender stereotypes? They do. Even people that are not transgender might get stuck trying to reach a goal that is impossible. What I have is "Gender Dysphoria" because it is strongly linked to my gender identity. However, nobody is safe from "Body Dysmorphic Disorder". There has been a increase in people who go see plastic chirurgeons with such filters as reference images[1]. In my case, that's a wanted effect. By sticking to society's gender stereotypes I increase my ability to pass unnoticed. It is fine for women to not follow those stereotypes. There are strong women, women who like to dress in male clothing, women who wear punk haircuts, sit with their legs spread out, etc. The thing is, those habits often cause people to take notice. In their case, people would look and think "Oh, this woman is punk. I [love/hate] how it looks!". In my case, that's often "Oh god, there is a man in the girl's bathroom. Let's call security!". I am aware of the stereotypes and hide behind them. That's not to say I never break them. In my daily life, I try to blend in. If I go to a bar and want to stand out? There's nothing stopping me from bending those rules. For example, my large shoulders that are a pain in my day to day life look amazing in studded leather coat. [1] "Please Don’t Ask a Plastic Surgeon to Make You Look Like a Snapchat Filter" - http://fortune.com/2018/08/03/please-dont-ask-a-plastic-surgeon-to-make-you-look-like-a-snapchat-filter/ http://fortune.com/2018/08/03/please-dont-ask-a-plastic-surg...

daenz 7y ago
Interesting, I've never realized how much of it was just wanting to blend in with everyone else. I'm not transgender, but I also feel much less anxious when I'm not standing out, so I can definitely relate there. Thank you for explaining.
- Raphmedia 7y ago
  Most (some would say all) transgender individuals suffer from gender dysphoria. In short, whenever we are reminded that our body is not like the image in our mind's eye it feels a bit like having a panic attack, being home sick & heart broken at the same time. The last thing you want to happen is people to actually know that you are transgender, much less misgender you. The transitioning body is not the gender's present in your mind's eye, it is the result of having lived through the wrong puberty. Being made aware of the fact that you are transgender often triggers dysphoria. Ever heard your voice in a recording and thought "Oh, that's not my voice -- it's just wrong. Must be the recording." and then felt a strong dislike towards that recording? Perhaps a bit of pain or cringe. Well, that's what a lot of transgender individuals experience daily when looking at their own bodies, hearing their own voice, seeing their image in the mirror, looking down at your own hands, etc.
  - SlowRobotAhead 7y ago
    That's a really interesting description, thanks. It seems like a very difficult condition and a constant source of anxiety. I struggle to think this is something anyone would choose for themselves. It makes me very worried for the three year old I know who's mother insists he/she is transgender. That this shouldn't be a trendy thing - but a serious struggle.
    - Raphmedia 7y ago
      One can choose whether they want to begin a social & hormonal transition but they cannot choose to not have the genetic and biological factors that are at play[1]. I doubt anyone take the decisions lightly. It is a huge burden on your life. In my case, I have decided to transition after 25 years of successfully living as a male. The burden of not transitioning was compounding with interest and I felt as if waiting any more would result in me being a toxic person both to myself and those surrounding me. Everyone has different factors at play. Personally, I had different hormonal levels than that of a regular male and had some female features as a child (testosterone bulldozes over those during puberty). I have also been told that my body processes estrogen slightly differently than the majority of males. Three years old is indeed the age where gender identity starts to appear in children. It could be possible that the mother is telling the truth but one cannot say without an actual health professional's advice. It is normal for a child to experience different gender identities at that age since the brain is still forming. Usually the identity begins to solidify around five. In the case that this identity cause distress in the child (attempting to mutilate themselves, depressive episodes, etc.), they should see a therapist. If there is a diagnostic of gender dysphoria which increase as their body develop, they might choose to use puberty blockers at the start of adolescence to stop the body from going through a puberty that increases this distress. It gives the child and therapist more time to go through those issues. Blockers can be stopped and a regular puberty would occur (with some possible health issue, so you shouldn't prescribe those unless the child is actually suffering). Should the feelings of distress and gender non-conformity still be present, discussion of an actual transition begin around sixteen years old. Children who transition from that path have the chance of not having lived the an extra puberty. It makes their transition easier and makes it less hard for the person to blend in as their actual gender. This avoid a lot of issues which adult transitioner have to struggle with their entire lives and will save on costs (facial feminization surgery, body feminization surgery, voice surgeries, etc.). [1] A starting point for more information about this could be: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender#Scientific_studies_of_transsexuality https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender#Scientific_studies...

daenz 7y ago

Interesting, I've never realized how much of it was just wanting to blend in with everyone else. I'm not transgender, but I also feel much less anxious when I'm not standing out, so I can definitely relate there. Thank you for explaining.

Raphmedia 7y ago
Most (some would say all) transgender individuals suffer from gender dysphoria. In short, whenever we are reminded that our body is not like the image in our mind's eye it feels a bit like having a panic attack, being home sick & heart broken at the same time. The last thing you want to happen is people to actually know that you are transgender, much less misgender you. The transitioning body is not the gender's present in your mind's eye, it is the result of having lived through the wrong puberty. Being made aware of the fact that you are transgender often triggers dysphoria. Ever heard your voice in a recording and thought "Oh, that's not my voice -- it's just wrong. Must be the recording." and then felt a strong dislike towards that recording? Perhaps a bit of pain or cringe. Well, that's what a lot of transgender individuals experience daily when looking at their own bodies, hearing their own voice, seeing their image in the mirror, looking down at your own hands, etc.
- SlowRobotAhead 7y ago
  That's a really interesting description, thanks. It seems like a very difficult condition and a constant source of anxiety. I struggle to think this is something anyone would choose for themselves. It makes me very worried for the three year old I know who's mother insists he/she is transgender. That this shouldn't be a trendy thing - but a serious struggle.
  - Raphmedia 7y ago
    One can choose whether they want to begin a social & hormonal transition but they cannot choose to not have the genetic and biological factors that are at play[1]. I doubt anyone take the decisions lightly. It is a huge burden on your life. In my case, I have decided to transition after 25 years of successfully living as a male. The burden of not transitioning was compounding with interest and I felt as if waiting any more would result in me being a toxic person both to myself and those surrounding me. Everyone has different factors at play. Personally, I had different hormonal levels than that of a regular male and had some female features as a child (testosterone bulldozes over those during puberty). I have also been told that my body processes estrogen slightly differently than the majority of males. Three years old is indeed the age where gender identity starts to appear in children. It could be possible that the mother is telling the truth but one cannot say without an actual health professional's advice. It is normal for a child to experience different gender identities at that age since the brain is still forming. Usually the identity begins to solidify around five. In the case that this identity cause distress in the child (attempting to mutilate themselves, depressive episodes, etc.), they should see a therapist. If there is a diagnostic of gender dysphoria which increase as their body develop, they might choose to use puberty blockers at the start of adolescence to stop the body from going through a puberty that increases this distress. It gives the child and therapist more time to go through those issues. Blockers can be stopped and a regular puberty would occur (with some possible health issue, so you shouldn't prescribe those unless the child is actually suffering). Should the feelings of distress and gender non-conformity still be present, discussion of an actual transition begin around sixteen years old. Children who transition from that path have the chance of not having lived the an extra puberty. It makes their transition easier and makes it less hard for the person to blend in as their actual gender. This avoid a lot of issues which adult transitioner have to struggle with their entire lives and will save on costs (facial feminization surgery, body feminization surgery, voice surgeries, etc.). [1] A starting point for more information about this could be: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender#Scientific_studies_of_transsexuality https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender#Scientific_studies...