5 ms·

I'm not sure what is so wrong with politely telling someone that you want to have sex with her or him. I mean I want many things but that doesn't mean I'll get

I'm not sure what is so wrong with politely telling someone that you want to have sex with her or him. I mean I want many things but that doesn't mean I'll get them.

soVeryTired 7y ago
There's a big difference between "would you like to go out for a drink?' and "I want to have sex with you". One poisons a working relationship, the other doesn't (if done with tact). Basically, if you wouldn't do it in front of your mom, don't do it to a colleague.
parabiii 7y ago
It is a very human want. I am also not sure what is wrong with it, when it is off-site, it is not your boss, and you are getting socially drunk together and without pressure. And if it is wrong, then so is wearing make-up at work. Give and take. Extending professional work ethics and norms to off-work social gatherings is toxic. Using social gatherings to "work" is sly. If you do not shoot, you'll always miss.
- majos 7y ago
  > And if it is wrong, then so is wearing make-up at work. Women I know wear makeup at work because many people view makeup as a "professional" or "put together" look, the same way a man might neatly comb their hair, not because they want to look sexy.
  - deleted 7y ago
    [deleted]
CydeWeys 7y ago
It's not appropriate at work, full stop. HR will have to discipline if not fire you in order to limit their legal liability for this. They will certainly have to fire you if you continue doing it after being asked to stop. They could be on the hooks for a lot of money in a nearly-guaranteed workplace harassment lawsuit if they allow you to persist. And anyway, if your intent is actually to get laid, then randomly asking people in professional environments is the worst way to do so. It's not even a good tactic in nightclubs, let alone in the workplace. So you're not actually accomplishing your intended goal; you're just harassing your female colleagues. Good god man, ask people out for drinks first, don't just jump immediately to asking for sex! Did no one teach you how dating or hook-ups work?!
- nitely 7y ago
  They were drunk, so probably not at work. Not saying it's right or wrong. But probably less wrong.
  - CydeWeys 7y ago
    You could still easily get fired for it, and the dumb shit you do outside of the office to your co-workers will haunt you once you get back to the office. It's not Vegas rules.
    - nitely 7y ago
      Well, maybe if someone record it and put it on social media. Otherwise, I doubt it. Actually, even then I doubt it, I've never seen it happen. From the article, it does not look like they got fired.
      - CydeWeys 7y ago
        I've seen it happen. There are plenty widely publicized instances of it happening, too. Anyway I said "could", not "would". It depends on how coarse you are with it, how dogged you are in doing so despite being told no, how many different people you do it to, and of course if you're reported. The overall point is, though, that it's not a good idea.

I'm not sure what is so wrong with politely telling someone that you want to have sex with her or him. I mean I want many things but that doesn't mean I'll get them.

soVeryTired 7y ago

There's a big difference between "would you like to go out for a drink?' and "I want to have sex with you". One poisons a working relationship, the other doesn't (if done with tact). Basically, if you wouldn't do it in front of your mom, don't do it to a colleague.

parabiii 7y ago

It is a very human want. I am also not sure what is wrong with it, when it is off-site, it is not your boss, and you are getting socially drunk together and without pressure. And if it is wrong, then so is wearing make-up at work. Give and take. Extending professional work ethics and norms to off-work social gatherings is toxic. Using social gatherings to "work" is sly. If you do not shoot, you'll always miss.

majos 7y ago
> And if it is wrong, then so is wearing make-up at work. Women I know wear makeup at work because many people view makeup as a "professional" or "put together" look, the same way a man might neatly comb their hair, not because they want to look sexy.
- deleted 7y ago
  [deleted]

CydeWeys 7y ago

It's not appropriate at work, full stop. HR will have to discipline if not fire you in order to limit their legal liability for this. They will certainly have to fire you if you continue doing it after being asked to stop. They could be on the hooks for a lot of money in a nearly-guaranteed workplace harassment lawsuit if they allow you to persist. And anyway, if your intent is actually to get laid, then randomly asking people in professional environments is the worst way to do so. It's not even a good tactic in nightclubs, let alone in the workplace. So you're not actually accomplishing your intended goal; you're just harassing your female colleagues. Good god man, ask people out for drinks first, don't just jump immediately to asking for sex! Did no one teach you how dating or hook-ups work?!

nitely 7y ago
They were drunk, so probably not at work. Not saying it's right or wrong. But probably less wrong.
- CydeWeys 7y ago
  You could still easily get fired for it, and the dumb shit you do outside of the office to your co-workers will haunt you once you get back to the office. It's not Vegas rules.
  - nitely 7y ago
    Well, maybe if someone record it and put it on social media. Otherwise, I doubt it. Actually, even then I doubt it, I've never seen it happen. From the article, it does not look like they got fired.
    - CydeWeys 7y ago
      I've seen it happen. There are plenty widely publicized instances of it happening, too. Anyway I said "could", not "would". It depends on how coarse you are with it, how dogged you are in doing so despite being told no, how many different people you do it to, and of course if you're reported. The overall point is, though, that it's not a good idea.