4 ms·

In our well to do South Bay neighborhood, it's about unknowns ringing their door bell, which is obviously a very suspicious activity. When my wife and I once h

by TomVDB 7y ago

In our well to do South Bay neighborhood, it's about unknowns ringing their door bell, which is obviously a very suspicious activity. When my wife and I once had to go to all the houses of the neighborhood, it was amazing how many people who were clearly at home did not open their door. It's a totally alien concept to where I originally come from.

scruple 7y ago
Also in a well-to-do neighborhood, though south in Orange County. I've had people look through their windows at me while I'm holding their mail, which was incorrectly delivered to my address. What can you do other than toss it at their door and go back home... I genuinely don't understand it, either.
- c22 7y ago
  The other day my girlfriend and I were getting into our car to leave the parking lot at the Y and some lady in a Lexus was "parked" directly behind our car, preventing us from leaving. Since she was in her car I figured if we got in our car and started the engine she would move, perhaps to one of the many open parking spots in the lot. After a minute or two of idling it was clear she wasn't going to do this so I went over to her driver's side and knocked on her window. She looked up from her phone (of course) and I smiled at her and waved and made the "roll down your window sign". She refused to roll down her window, even just a crack! She looked at me with horror through the glass and mouthed "can I help you?" At this point my politeness bit flipped and I yelled "yeah, you can move your fucking car so I can get out!" This was in the middle of the day with numerous people milling about, I don't understand what she was even afraid of.
function_seven 7y ago
My doorbell has become as bad as my cell phone. 70% of the time I hear it ring, it's someone trying to sell me solar panels, home security systems, Jehovah, some of the latter day saints, tree trimming, or the "gas company" (really a window installation company). Another 25% of the time its a package delivery and the courier is gone before I get to the door. So basically 1 in 20 chance that the person is a neighbor. I'm loathe to drop whatever it is I'm doing to get up and answer the door, just to have to shoo away solicitors.
ryandrake 7y ago
In this thread people are scared to open their doors when someone knocks. In the other thread people are scared to knock on their neighbor’s door. How did this society become so irrationally terrified of everything? I know people who won’t let their kids outside because they think crime is everywhere. This is in a firmly middle class single family home Leave It To Beaver neighborhood.
- astura 7y ago
  People probably aren't scared so much as they don't want to be bothered because 90% of the time it's someone selling something (religion, magazines, carpet cleaning, etc.)
- standardUser 7y ago
  Communication technology has changed everything. We expect to be communicated with first in ways that have a minimal impact on our time and personal space, like text, email or a messaging system. We can handle those communications if and when we deem fit. Someone calling on the phone or knocking on the door is someone demanding immediate and exclusive use of my time for reasons only they know. In the case of a door, they are also asking for access to my home (to a degree). The fact that the vast majority of those calls and knocks are for sales, religion or politics make us rightly avoidant. And sure, some can even be dangerous. But almost none of them are people we actually want to communicate with. Those people would have already called/texted/emailed. If they called, we'd recognize their number. If they were coming over, they'd give us advance warning. So the folks left surprising us are the folks we are least likely to want to engage with.

by TomVDB 7y ago

scruple 7y ago

Also in a well-to-do neighborhood, though south in Orange County. I've had people look through their windows at me while I'm holding their mail, which was incorrectly delivered to my address. What can you do other than toss it at their door and go back home... I genuinely don't understand it, either.

c22 7y ago
The other day my girlfriend and I were getting into our car to leave the parking lot at the Y and some lady in a Lexus was "parked" directly behind our car, preventing us from leaving. Since she was in her car I figured if we got in our car and started the engine she would move, perhaps to one of the many open parking spots in the lot. After a minute or two of idling it was clear she wasn't going to do this so I went over to her driver's side and knocked on her window. She looked up from her phone (of course) and I smiled at her and waved and made the "roll down your window sign". She refused to roll down her window, even just a crack! She looked at me with horror through the glass and mouthed "can I help you?" At this point my politeness bit flipped and I yelled "yeah, you can move your fucking car so I can get out!" This was in the middle of the day with numerous people milling about, I don't understand what she was even afraid of.

function_seven 7y ago

My doorbell has become as bad as my cell phone. 70% of the time I hear it ring, it's someone trying to sell me solar panels, home security systems, Jehovah, some of the latter day saints, tree trimming, or the "gas company" (really a window installation company). Another 25% of the time its a package delivery and the courier is gone before I get to the door. So basically 1 in 20 chance that the person is a neighbor. I'm loathe to drop whatever it is I'm doing to get up and answer the door, just to have to shoo away solicitors.

ryandrake 7y ago

In this thread people are scared to open their doors when someone knocks. In the other thread people are scared to knock on their neighbor’s door. How did this society become so irrationally terrified of everything? I know people who won’t let their kids outside because they think crime is everywhere. This is in a firmly middle class single family home Leave It To Beaver neighborhood.

astura 7y ago
People probably aren't scared so much as they don't want to be bothered because 90% of the time it's someone selling something (religion, magazines, carpet cleaning, etc.)
standardUser 7y ago
Communication technology has changed everything. We expect to be communicated with first in ways that have a minimal impact on our time and personal space, like text, email or a messaging system. We can handle those communications if and when we deem fit. Someone calling on the phone or knocking on the door is someone demanding immediate and exclusive use of my time for reasons only they know. In the case of a door, they are also asking for access to my home (to a degree). The fact that the vast majority of those calls and knocks are for sales, religion or politics make us rightly avoidant. And sure, some can even be dangerous. But almost none of them are people we actually want to communicate with. Those people would have already called/texted/emailed. If they called, we'd recognize their number. If they were coming over, they'd give us advance warning. So the folks left surprising us are the folks we are least likely to want to engage with.