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The PDF linked in the article [0] is pure gold. > C. The investment in our DNA leads to breakthrough innovation and allows us to move out of the traditional l
by lqet 8y ago
The PDF linked in the article [0] is pure gold.
> C. The investment in our DNA leads to breakthrough innovation and allows us to move out of the traditional linear system and into the future
> BREATHTAKING is a strategy based on the evolution of 5000+ years of shared ideas in design philosophy creating
an authentic Constitution of Design.
> B. Magnetic Fields: Magnetic fields exert forces on inner and outer surfaces of the Earth.
> B. Pepsi Energy Fields: Symmetrical energy fields are in balance.
> C. Magnetic Dynamics: Magnetic field are impacted by sun radiation and wind motion.
> C. The Pepsi Globe Dynamics: Emotive forces shape the gestalt of the brand identity.
Also, take a look at the deconstruction of the old Pepsi logos into arbitrary ellipses ("Perimeter Oscillations") on pages 8ff.
It gets increasingly surreal ("Light Path with Gravitational Pull" vs "Gravitational Pull of Pepsi", "Relativity of Space and Time" vs "Pepsi Proposition / Pepsi Aisle", difference between a "Pepsi Galaxy" and a "Pepsi Universe", ...) on the last pages.
Dimensionalize exponentially.
[0] https://jimedwardsnrx.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/pepsi_gravitational_field.pdf https://jimedwardsnrx.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/pepsi_grav...
- ubertakter 8y agoI just skimmed through the PDF (not that it has much content). I can't believe someone paid for that. Clearly I'm in the wrong business.
- cocochanel 8y agoThis PDF is hilarious. How can anyone get away with so much bullshit is beyond me.
- ravenstine 8y agoAnd people in charge believe that kind of shit.
- xkcd-sucks 8y agoC O C A I N E
- gridlockd 8y agoI wouldn't assume that. In these echelons, people are generally aware that they're all bullshitting each other.
- aerique 8y agoI'm curious why your perfectly fine comments are being downvoted.
- VectorLock 8y agoI can't tell if this is real or not. It feels like the Turbo Encabulator of design.
- deleted 8y ago[deleted]
- rospaya 8y agoIt's one step away from VX junkies. https://www.reddit.com/r/VXJunkies/ https://www.reddit.com/r/VXJunkies/
- deleted 8y ago[deleted]
- kevin_thibedeau 8y agoThey need to justify the spend for the execs with something that looks like it took more than 100 man hours to work out. What I'm curious about is how much these design agencies recycle their stock bullshit for different clients. Just swap in different logos. Restyle with the new palette of pretentiously named colors. Apply the new commissioned font and voila, you have a rebranding document the C levels can feel chuffed about.
- scott_s 8y agoThat document is astounding. My jaw dropped, literally, on some pages.
- logfromblammo 8y ago> "Emotive forces shape the gestalt of the brand identity." This is where I lost it. And that's when they literally started building a "tiny brain, normal brain, enlightened brain, galaxy brain, universe brain" meme, out of freaking Pepsi logos.
- bsanr2 8y agoI can't possibly be the only one here who understands what they were getting at, right? It seems silly but it's pretty obvious that they're just trying to get at the intentions and associations behind their aesthetic decisions. It's only as absurd as human pattern-seeking behavior is in general.
- Kalium 8y agoOh, I definitely get what they're getting at. They just wrapped it up in way, way more window-dressing than was remotely justified. It makes the whole thing look farcical.
- nearbuy 8y agoThe pdf author thinks a light year is a speed and the universe expands at f(x) = e^x. Someone was copying stuff they didn't understand off the internet.
- andybak 8y ago> I can't possibly be the only one here who understands what they were getting at, right? It was both accurate and profound. Unfortunately the parts that were accurate were trivial and the parts that were profound were incorrect.
- davemp 8y agoMy favorite is: C. The Pepsi Globe Dynamics Emotive forces shape the gestalt of the brand identity.
- Waterluvian 8y agoI didn't even know those words were allowed to be together.
- heavenlyblue 8y agoWell, you could take that literally, or you could take that as a marketing draft, where every idea written in the PDF would later be used as part of advertising. Bullshit is what makes good video adverts rememberable. It just has to be unique bullshit.