4 ms·

You need to keep things off the books sometimes. Try saving up for a significant other's gift, if you can't keep a few things hidden.

verbify 8y ago
Do you not have a personal bank account that your significant other doesn't audit?
- Broken_Hippo 8y ago
  While this is common where I live now (Norway), it is not common in the states. Married couples (or just couples) often have a joint account. It was more difficult to transfer money between two people's accounts as well, though there is a chance this has changed recently.
  - 2038AD 8y ago
    FWIW In the US something called Zelle launched a couple of years ago https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zelle_(payment_service) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zelle_(payment_service)
    - mcguire 8y ago
      Previously, it was free and easy to transfer money between accounts at the same institution (BoA, if it matters) (modulo the $1000/day limit). Post Zelle? I dunno. The last time I just wrote a check.
      - Broken_Hippo 8y ago
        That's not good enough, though. I shouldn't have to have the same bank as my spouse. NOt all banks offer both partners value, nor should either give up long-standing accounts for this. I don't mind a small fee, but it can't make think twice sending rent money or food money to the spouse or him doing the same to me. A direct transfer from online banking might take overnight or over the weekend, but there is an app that lets folks pay each other that is low-cost and speedy (or pay for a soda from a machine).
mschuetz 8y ago
The concept of not having your own private bank account that isn't shared with your significant other or anyone else baffles me.
- frosted-flakes 8y ago
  Why? It baffles me that a husband and wife don't trust each other enough to pool their resources.
  - hocuspocus 8y ago
    Not having the freedom to keep some money separately and use it as you see fit sounds so 1950. We have a joint credit card but I don't see why we'd ever need a joint bank account.
    - frosted-flakes 8y ago
      I'm curious; how do you decide who pays for what? If you're splitting the bills for everything anyway, and since you've dedicated your lives to each other (presumably, if you're married), it feels like a pointless exercise to keep separate finances.
      - lawn 8y ago
        You trust each other to list what common items they've bought. We have separate bank accounts and credit cards and we split the bills most things, like groceries. But we don't look into what personal purchases we make, for example me buying Lego. It's pretty easy to decide if we should pay together or not. At least for us.
        frosted-flakes 8y ago
        I agree that each spouse should have some of their "own" money to spend as they see fit, but to me, it makes sense for all income to go into a single pot. Shared expenses come from the pot, while a certain amount of spending money is set aside for each spouse each week/month/whatever. Whether that money is put into separate accounts or is just two lines in the budget doesn't really matter. (YNAB would be good for something like this, and this is actually a setup the company founder suggests). That way, you never have to deal with splitting shared expenses, there's no worrying about who's earning more, and financial decisions are by default made together, but you can still buy your LEGO with your own money.
stevesimmons 8y ago
The way we handle it is all our bank accounts are joint accounts. We also each have our own credit card, which get repaid in full each month from our joint current account. Everyday spending is on the debit cards, and immediately visible in our online banking apps. Birthday presents and things we want some privacy about go on our individual credit cards, with just the total monthly repayment visible in the joint account.

verbify 8y ago

Do you not have a personal bank account that your significant other doesn't audit?

Broken_Hippo 8y ago
While this is common where I live now (Norway), it is not common in the states. Married couples (or just couples) often have a joint account. It was more difficult to transfer money between two people's accounts as well, though there is a chance this has changed recently.
- 2038AD 8y ago
  FWIW In the US something called Zelle launched a couple of years ago https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zelle_(payment_service) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zelle_(payment_service)
  - mcguire 8y ago
    Previously, it was free and easy to transfer money between accounts at the same institution (BoA, if it matters) (modulo the $1000/day limit). Post Zelle? I dunno. The last time I just wrote a check.
    - Broken_Hippo 8y ago
      That's not good enough, though. I shouldn't have to have the same bank as my spouse. NOt all banks offer both partners value, nor should either give up long-standing accounts for this. I don't mind a small fee, but it can't make think twice sending rent money or food money to the spouse or him doing the same to me. A direct transfer from online banking might take overnight or over the weekend, but there is an app that lets folks pay each other that is low-cost and speedy (or pay for a soda from a machine).

mschuetz 8y ago

The concept of not having your own private bank account that isn't shared with your significant other or anyone else baffles me.

frosted-flakes 8y ago
Why? It baffles me that a husband and wife don't trust each other enough to pool their resources.
- hocuspocus 8y ago
  Not having the freedom to keep some money separately and use it as you see fit sounds so 1950. We have a joint credit card but I don't see why we'd ever need a joint bank account.
  - frosted-flakes 8y ago
    I'm curious; how do you decide who pays for what? If you're splitting the bills for everything anyway, and since you've dedicated your lives to each other (presumably, if you're married), it feels like a pointless exercise to keep separate finances.
    - lawn 8y ago
      You trust each other to list what common items they've bought. We have separate bank accounts and credit cards and we split the bills most things, like groceries. But we don't look into what personal purchases we make, for example me buying Lego. It's pretty easy to decide if we should pay together or not. At least for us.
      - frosted-flakes 8y ago
        I agree that each spouse should have some of their "own" money to spend as they see fit, but to me, it makes sense for all income to go into a single pot. Shared expenses come from the pot, while a certain amount of spending money is set aside for each spouse each week/month/whatever. Whether that money is put into separate accounts or is just two lines in the budget doesn't really matter. (YNAB would be good for something like this, and this is actually a setup the company founder suggests). That way, you never have to deal with splitting shared expenses, there's no worrying about who's earning more, and financial decisions are by default made together, but you can still buy your LEGO with your own money.

stevesimmons 8y ago

The way we handle it is all our bank accounts are joint accounts. We also each have our own credit card, which get repaid in full each month from our joint current account. Everyday spending is on the debit cards, and immediately visible in our online banking apps. Birthday presents and things we want some privacy about go on our individual credit cards, with just the total monthly repayment visible in the joint account.