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Don't aspire to be a high performer. It's a lie. People posture and virtue signal and Instagram how they want to be perceived, and the nerd crowd is no exceptio

Don't aspire to be a high performer. It's a lie. People posture and virtue signal and Instagram how they want to be perceived, and the nerd crowd is no exception. Want to know the secret to social and economic power housing? Contacts! You only get real power when other people contribute to it, whether you're an artist or a financeer or a scientist or whatever. You succeed when your network wants you to succeed. How many things you can do at once is irrelevant, and only puts you on par with the horse in Animal Farm. But there's nothing that says you must play that game. Success in life is not how many shinies you get. It's about your deep connections. Nobody on their death bed wishes they'd gotten that Ferrari. Get the money you need to do the things you want with the people you care about. How you get it is up to you, but it doesn't have to be the measure of your life. Stop. Enjoy where you are now, because you'll never be able to come back to it. See the wonder that's right in front of you. Enjoy your youth while you still have it.

blablabla123 8y ago
Yes, doing two full-time things at the same time is an illusion. Obviously there are people who studied several subjects. Of those that I know better I realized they got sub-optimal grades and/or had to extend there study time. Contacts and continuously growing your network in the areas you are good at or at least highly interested with basic knowledge is also key. But at the same time a lot of work is necessary but in a single position though. Not to forget that many people who "did it" financially might have done that on the cost of other people, may it be friends or family. But yes, it boils down to trading life for work.
all2 8y ago
> Don't aspire to be a high performer. It's a lie. Thank you for this reminder. It is often hard for me to see past projections. It is also hard to accept that I cannot do everything that I want to do. > Success in life is not how many shinies you get. I'm not so concerned about "success" on the world's terms. What I'm concerned about is the long periods of procrastination, being stressed about outstanding commitments (school? work?), feeling overwhelmed even though I know what I need to do next... > See the wonder that's right in front of you. Enjoy your youth while you still have it. Again, thank you for the reminder. I get lost in the world of "pending responsibilities" often enough that a reminder to slow down brings me some peace.
- kstenerud 8y ago
  I've found that I start procrastinating most after I've run myself too hard. It's important to have lazy days, where the goal is to accomplish nothing at all. This is one area I really struggle in, even after all these years...
  - all2 8y ago
    I feel like I need lazy days about 1/2 of all days. Maybe this has to do with how I meter out my deep(er) work. I typically procrastinate enough that I spend 10 to 12 hours the day an assignment is due to get it done. Part of that is I get stressed out thinking about the assignment prior to when it is due, so I put it off. I've been reading GTD and I think at least part of my stress response is not having clear outcomes or clear next steps... I've been working to clarify my most important (time sensitive) projects and it seems to be helping some.
- aprdm 8y ago
  Seems like Anxiety and other feelings are messing a lot with you, I personally recommend some spiritual time :), things like meditating can really help. I found a lot of things in buddhism that related to me and helped me a lot in some bad times of my life.
ericzawo 8y ago
This may be one of the better HN comments I've ever read. I would just like to add that all jobs, all experiences, aspirations, goals, boil down to other people. Focus on them and help them; it's likely you already know people who have the capacity to point you in the direction that you want to take your life.

blablabla123 8y ago

Yes, doing two full-time things at the same time is an illusion. Obviously there are people who studied several subjects. Of those that I know better I realized they got sub-optimal grades and/or had to extend there study time. Contacts and continuously growing your network in the areas you are good at or at least highly interested with basic knowledge is also key. But at the same time a lot of work is necessary but in a single position though. Not to forget that many people who "did it" financially might have done that on the cost of other people, may it be friends or family. But yes, it boils down to trading life for work.

all2 8y ago

> Don't aspire to be a high performer. It's a lie. Thank you for this reminder. It is often hard for me to see past projections. It is also hard to accept that I cannot do everything that I want to do. > Success in life is not how many shinies you get. I'm not so concerned about "success" on the world's terms. What I'm concerned about is the long periods of procrastination, being stressed about outstanding commitments (school? work?), feeling overwhelmed even though I know what I need to do next... > See the wonder that's right in front of you. Enjoy your youth while you still have it. Again, thank you for the reminder. I get lost in the world of "pending responsibilities" often enough that a reminder to slow down brings me some peace.

kstenerud 8y ago
I've found that I start procrastinating most after I've run myself too hard. It's important to have lazy days, where the goal is to accomplish nothing at all. This is one area I really struggle in, even after all these years...
- all2 8y ago
  I feel like I need lazy days about 1/2 of all days. Maybe this has to do with how I meter out my deep(er) work. I typically procrastinate enough that I spend 10 to 12 hours the day an assignment is due to get it done. Part of that is I get stressed out thinking about the assignment prior to when it is due, so I put it off. I've been reading GTD and I think at least part of my stress response is not having clear outcomes or clear next steps... I've been working to clarify my most important (time sensitive) projects and it seems to be helping some.
aprdm 8y ago
Seems like Anxiety and other feelings are messing a lot with you, I personally recommend some spiritual time :), things like meditating can really help. I found a lot of things in buddhism that related to me and helped me a lot in some bad times of my life.

ericzawo 8y ago

This may be one of the better HN comments I've ever read. I would just like to add that all jobs, all experiences, aspirations, goals, boil down to other people. Focus on them and help them; it's likely you already know people who have the capacity to point you in the direction that you want to take your life.