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I like the point of self examination, and not assuming you know others intentions, but I really dislike this sort of phrase reassignment. The one that really b
by dec0dedab0de 8y ago
I like the point of self examination, and not assuming you know others intentions, but I really dislike this sort of phrase reassignment. The one that really bothers me, is when people say "I feel like..." followed by something that is not a feeling. Changing the wording only works when everyone is on board with the reason for doing so.
- pault 8y agoAnything that follows "I feel like" is going to be some passive aggressive garbage. This is why I always say "I think", "I strongly suggest", "I agree", "I disagree" instead. You have to recognize that some things are subjective but telling someone that they should do something because you "feel" it needs to be done comes across as incredibly flaky and self-involved.
- watwut 8y agoI am the opposite. I hate when people pretend to talk objectively while actually talking about feelings. For example claiming the code is objectively bad when it is just that they have negative emotional reaction to some difference against how they would do it. Or trying to convince me to do something out of "objective" reasons when they are just stressed or afraid or panicking. Or talk with certainty when situation is not certain at all and they know it. Like, I am willing to accommodate your feelings to some extend, but not when you pretend it is all rational choices. I feel like..." followed by something that is not a feeling usually just conveys uncertainty or awareness what follows is not fully proven. It is more honest, imo.
- dec0dedab0de 8y agoI understand what you mean, but in those situations i prefer "it might be better if" or "i think we should."