3 ms·

Given that the concept for this app is to "bring human interactions back to the dating scene", I'm not sure it serves any purpose. The idea is to see who aroun

Given that the concept for this app is to "bring human interactions back to the dating scene", I'm not sure it serves any purpose. The idea is to see who around your physically location is single and strike up a conversation. And the example(s) given are bars and things like that. Hasn't that been going on forever without this app? Everyone knows where to find single people in large quantities. What value does it provide? The fact that you know with certainty that someone is single (or at least claims to be)? You still know nothing about them and cannot converse with them on your phone. You must initiate face to face contact, which is all fine and great. But all of this would theoretically happen anyway without the app. Also, there at least two issues I see with the concept that make dating worse. First, the example on the site of the guy who "doesn't want to be actively looking for singles tonight, he wants to let people know that he's single". That's called laziness. This fictitious guy is going to basically just put out the digital equivalent of "hey ladies I'm single" and wait for the women to swarm? Yeah, ok. Only in rare instances will that happen because socially we still function in mostly the same way (men are still expected to pursue). And in the reverse scenario where a woman does that...well, that's basically exactly how society functions right now. Women know how to project that they are single in a setting like a bar. Men observe, figure out who they might have a chance with, and then attempt to strike up a conversation and pursue. So the app literally offers nothing in that regard. Second, people will probably be more prone to only risk talking to someone they see on the app as a confirmed single because it's less risky. This would make their choices smaller because they are probably unconsciously eliminating everyone else on the basis of risk. This makes the dating scene worse, not better. Unless damn near everyone was on the app and used it all the time. Which I'm sure the app developer would love. But realistically almost surely won't happen.

vonseel 8y ago
Strong feelings. In all seriousness, people already use tinder and similar apps like this. Sitting at bars, swiping. Not talking to strangers because “it’s not normal to just go up and talk to women/men that you don’t know”. This is the world we have built for ourselves! Technology is wonderful, isn’t it?
- standardUser 8y ago
  Maybe it is. I know many women who would prefer strange men never randomly bother them in pursuit of romantic and sexual interest.
  - vonseel 8y ago
    Men are such horrible creatures! I understand the sentiment, sadly, being a male, there’s little I can do to thwart its own impact on my social life, except, of course, not be creepy. Oh wait, you said “in pursuit of romantic and sexual interest”. I didn’t real your full sentence off the bat. Well, how does one know a “strange” (unknown) man is “bothering” (strong word, I’d have chosen introduce) in pursuit of sexual or romantic interests? Are men and women really not allowed to be friends on a non-intimate level? Does introducing myself to a woman immediately imply that I want to seduce her? I wish that weren’t the case. I feel in many ways I relate and have more interests in common with women, and no, I am not a homosexual, or any modern label, just a normal guy.
zazen 8y ago
>What value does it provide? The fact that you know with certainty that someone is single (or at least claims to be)? You'd also know that they're advertising that they're open to being approached - it might relieve some anxiety knowing that you're going to be rejected simply for approaching someone that isn't interested in being approached at all. >just put the digital equivalent of "hey ladies I'm single" and wait for the women to swarm? Yeah, ok. Yes, they've gender-inverted their example in order to be politically correct. You're right that men will still pursue, but I think the app might offer something to men who are less than perfect at detecting which women are signalling they want to be approached. A lot of men would like some de-risking on that front, even at the expense of reducing the total size of the pool. EDIT: wait, unless it's a thing like bumble where only the woman can make the first move? In that case yeah, I don't see it taking off
- turc1656 8y ago
  Your comment got me thinking about another issue. The "sorry, I have a boyfriend" excuse would no longer be valid as an easy way to let someone down. With that gone, all that's left is the truth. Also, I had always viewed the ability to deal with sub-optimal outcomes well as a form of character-building. For example, would you rather be the person who has never encountered/taken the risk of approaching someone who is taken, says no to you, or is just not in the mood to be approached that specific night? I'd much rather be able to deal with those situations gracefully. Similarly, I'd much rather learn to observe body language and everything else to determine which women are indicating certain things non-verbally. The general case of that is reading people and it's a critical life skill. I think a lot of technology, particularly the stuff surrounding dating, does a lot of harm to society, human interaction, and people's character overall. This is just another one to add to the list for me. I can't tell you how many people who are roughly 10-15 years younger than me have zero skills in talking to the opposite sex. And many have, shockingly, never really been in a scenario where they've had to actually turn on the charm, make an effort, and hold a conversation. This manifests itself in the workplace when we have events, meet clients, go out for drinks, etc. They are duds and have zero personality. It's utterly depressing.

vonseel 8y ago

Strong feelings. In all seriousness, people already use tinder and similar apps like this. Sitting at bars, swiping. Not talking to strangers because “it’s not normal to just go up and talk to women/men that you don’t know”. This is the world we have built for ourselves! Technology is wonderful, isn’t it?

standardUser 8y ago
Maybe it is. I know many women who would prefer strange men never randomly bother them in pursuit of romantic and sexual interest.
- vonseel 8y ago
  Men are such horrible creatures! I understand the sentiment, sadly, being a male, there’s little I can do to thwart its own impact on my social life, except, of course, not be creepy. Oh wait, you said “in pursuit of romantic and sexual interest”. I didn’t real your full sentence off the bat. Well, how does one know a “strange” (unknown) man is “bothering” (strong word, I’d have chosen introduce) in pursuit of sexual or romantic interests? Are men and women really not allowed to be friends on a non-intimate level? Does introducing myself to a woman immediately imply that I want to seduce her? I wish that weren’t the case. I feel in many ways I relate and have more interests in common with women, and no, I am not a homosexual, or any modern label, just a normal guy.

zazen 8y ago

>What value does it provide? The fact that you know with certainty that someone is single (or at least claims to be)? You'd also know that they're advertising that they're open to being approached - it might relieve some anxiety knowing that you're going to be rejected simply for approaching someone that isn't interested in being approached at all. >just put the digital equivalent of "hey ladies I'm single" and wait for the women to swarm? Yeah, ok. Yes, they've gender-inverted their example in order to be politically correct. You're right that men will still pursue, but I think the app might offer something to men who are less than perfect at detecting which women are signalling they want to be approached. A lot of men would like some de-risking on that front, even at the expense of reducing the total size of the pool. EDIT: wait, unless it's a thing like bumble where only the woman can make the first move? In that case yeah, I don't see it taking off

turc1656 8y ago
Your comment got me thinking about another issue. The "sorry, I have a boyfriend" excuse would no longer be valid as an easy way to let someone down. With that gone, all that's left is the truth. Also, I had always viewed the ability to deal with sub-optimal outcomes well as a form of character-building. For example, would you rather be the person who has never encountered/taken the risk of approaching someone who is taken, says no to you, or is just not in the mood to be approached that specific night? I'd much rather be able to deal with those situations gracefully. Similarly, I'd much rather learn to observe body language and everything else to determine which women are indicating certain things non-verbally. The general case of that is reading people and it's a critical life skill. I think a lot of technology, particularly the stuff surrounding dating, does a lot of harm to society, human interaction, and people's character overall. This is just another one to add to the list for me. I can't tell you how many people who are roughly 10-15 years younger than me have zero skills in talking to the opposite sex. And many have, shockingly, never really been in a scenario where they've had to actually turn on the charm, make an effort, and hold a conversation. This manifests itself in the workplace when we have events, meet clients, go out for drinks, etc. They are duds and have zero personality. It's utterly depressing.