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>We should be thankful, not weirdly bragging about how hard our childhoods were. The kids that ended their lives aren't bragging or complaining anymore. This

>We should be thankful, not weirdly bragging about how hard our childhoods were. The kids that ended their lives aren't bragging or complaining anymore. This author speaks on their behalf. It is not a life-defining tragedy until it becomes a life-ending one. And saying "you should be happy" doesn't help a bit to those who are getting tired of living. Some people have it better, some have it worse. The kids who killed themselves don't have it any way. The kids who are writing these posts could have been next in line. Mental health is a serious issue, and collectively, the successful part of the Valley seems to be very, very broken. A rich person with cancer is still a person with cancer. A successful kid with depression is still a kid with depression. So I'd ask y'all to show some empathy, as withiut empathy there is no understanding, and without understanding, there's no fixing the problem. And there is a problem. Something is rotten. And have some empathy for yourself too (yes, that's you, parent commenter!). If you grew up like this kid did, yes, you grew up in a fucked-up environment, it probably fucked you up, and it's not right. If you feel obligated to be happy, you are broken. What you have doesn't define who you are. And a well-paying job doesn't give you all you need. Being poor sucks, but that's just one way life can suck. There are many, many others. And the only way to get to a happy life is to understand what makes you happy and thankful rather than what you feel you should be happy and thankful for. The disconnect between the two -- well, that's a part of how those kids ended up on the tracks. I didn't grow up in the Valley (or anything remotely similar), but I live here now. It's a silly place. Take care of yourself, y'all.

bduerst 8y ago
You've missed what they're saying in their comment. Mental health is a serious issue, but the author isn't bringing up these suicides to talk about how she's going to help prevent them, or even bring attention to suicide in high schools - she's using it in a social media-esque post about why she's out. She's done. Goodbye Silicon Valley, you're not the utopia I expected right out of college with my cushy job and free lunches. People around me are suffering and I'm not, so I'm not going to help you, I'm just going to leave because of a false trichotomy. It's not me, it's you. If people complain about this post rubbing them the wrong way, it's not because the people complaining are insensitive to the issues like mental health, it's because of the narcissistic tone of using these issues in a break up letter with the place you grew up in.
- romwell 8y ago
  I didn't take the original article the way you described it, and I don't think there's anything wrong with the "I'm done" attitude. Nobody is obligated to fight all the battles all the time to begin with, and beyond that, speaking out and voting with one's feet is an effective way to cause change. To gauge effectiveness, think this way: what would happen if everyone in her position did the same thing? Most certainly the area would experience a drastic change. You know what's not effective? Shaming people into silence by calling them narcissistic. Sure, you can write off her experience as whining - and how's that going to help anyone? The kids who committed suicide were going through what the author was going through, more or less, and committed suicide for the same reasons the author does not feel happy in the Bay Area. I don't know what else to say except that what she says matters. Listen to it. In any case, my main take-away from the post was this: the Bay Area is not a healthy environment even for the well-off kids to grow up in, and to live in. The damage of the competitive rat-race is not offset by the prize of getting a FAANG job even for those who get there. In the end, people like her make are representative of what drives the culture here, and this culture sucks. And again: act to change, understand to act, empathize to understand. This starts with you.
  - bduerst 8y ago
    You accused GP of taking mental health issues too lightly. I reiterated their point of how the tone of this article rubs people the wrong way. I'm not shaming anyone, just as the GP here isn't taking mental health issues lightly either. Again, nobody is saying these issues are to be taken lightly, or that anyone is obligated to solve them (that's part of the false trichotomy I talked about). Please stop accusing people and projecting these straw men.
    - romwell 8y ago
      >You accused GP of taking mental health issues too lightly. Excuse me, but I did not make that accusation anywhere.I asked them to exhibit some empathy, as I do you. >Please stop accusing people and projecting these straw men. Indeed. >I'm not shaming anyone You mocked and called the author narcissistic for saying what she did. That is shaming. >(that's part of the false trichotomy I talked about). Well, could you at least tell what the three parts that make it are?

bduerst 8y ago

You've missed what they're saying in their comment. Mental health is a serious issue, but the author isn't bringing up these suicides to talk about how she's going to help prevent them, or even bring attention to suicide in high schools - she's using it in a social media-esque post about why she's out. She's done. Goodbye Silicon Valley, you're not the utopia I expected right out of college with my cushy job and free lunches. People around me are suffering and I'm not, so I'm not going to help you, I'm just going to leave because of a false trichotomy. It's not me, it's you. If people complain about this post rubbing them the wrong way, it's not because the people complaining are insensitive to the issues like mental health, it's because of the narcissistic tone of using these issues in a break up letter with the place you grew up in.

romwell 8y ago
I didn't take the original article the way you described it, and I don't think there's anything wrong with the "I'm done" attitude. Nobody is obligated to fight all the battles all the time to begin with, and beyond that, speaking out and voting with one's feet is an effective way to cause change. To gauge effectiveness, think this way: what would happen if everyone in her position did the same thing? Most certainly the area would experience a drastic change. You know what's not effective? Shaming people into silence by calling them narcissistic. Sure, you can write off her experience as whining - and how's that going to help anyone? The kids who committed suicide were going through what the author was going through, more or less, and committed suicide for the same reasons the author does not feel happy in the Bay Area. I don't know what else to say except that what she says matters. Listen to it. In any case, my main take-away from the post was this: the Bay Area is not a healthy environment even for the well-off kids to grow up in, and to live in. The damage of the competitive rat-race is not offset by the prize of getting a FAANG job even for those who get there. In the end, people like her make are representative of what drives the culture here, and this culture sucks. And again: act to change, understand to act, empathize to understand. This starts with you.
- bduerst 8y ago
  You accused GP of taking mental health issues too lightly. I reiterated their point of how the tone of this article rubs people the wrong way. I'm not shaming anyone, just as the GP here isn't taking mental health issues lightly either. Again, nobody is saying these issues are to be taken lightly, or that anyone is obligated to solve them (that's part of the false trichotomy I talked about). Please stop accusing people and projecting these straw men.
  - romwell 8y ago
    >You accused GP of taking mental health issues too lightly. Excuse me, but I did not make that accusation anywhere.I asked them to exhibit some empathy, as I do you. >Please stop accusing people and projecting these straw men. Indeed. >I'm not shaming anyone You mocked and called the author narcissistic for saying what she did. That is shaming. >(that's part of the false trichotomy I talked about). Well, could you at least tell what the three parts that make it are?