I suggest reading the Gospel of John. NKJV translation if you like poetry, or The Message if you have a bad religious experience in your background. My father

I suggest reading the Gospel of John. NKJV translation if you like poetry, or The Message if you have a bad religious experience in your background. My father was born to and raised by an atheist and an agnostic, and grew up to be an atheist who used to publicly dare God to strike him dead, as evidence that God did not exist. His study of organic chemistry in college eventually led him to conclude begrudgingly that a Prime Mover seemed more reasonable than spontaneous generation. He and some friends modeled a minimalist single-cell life form and calculated the odds of spontaneously generating it in ideal circumstances, and he just couldn't call pure atheism plausible after that exercise. A few years later, he read the Bible so he could taunt his Christian friends with all the mistakes and inconsistencies he was sure he'd find. He wound up believing it instead, almost against his will, as he now describes it. Maybe you'll find something similar occurs. If it does, it would resolve the fear of death as a side effect, as Jesus saving us from death is an essential part of the message. If you spend a few hours reading it and walk away utterly unimpressed, then if nothing else you at least have a better knowledge of a major influence on the development of Western culture.