It absolutely is. By appealing to nicety, you can screw people over subtly enough that it doesn't register to observers as offense, and then act offended yourse

It absolutely is. By appealing to nicety, you can screw people over subtly enough that it doesn't register to observers as offense, and then act offended yourself when you get pushback. You can also add in some fundamental attribution error, as in "I am just looking out for everyone. You are being difficult. They are engaging in bad faith."