I totally understand this mindset... I had it, too. And so I lived in Carroll Gardens and Cobble Hill and paid through the teeth for tiny, mouse infested holes.

I totally understand this mindset... I had it, too. And so I lived in Carroll Gardens and Cobble Hill and paid through the teeth for tiny, mouse infested holes. But, I think that the NYC-to-NJ barrier does tend to be just that, a mindset. Because after all -- you still have to take a train back to Brooklyn, no? And its not like Hoboken doesn't have a street-filling, bar hopping main street. As for friends and what not -- the startup I work for: No one person lives with 15 minutes of another (in the technical team.) NYC is spread out enough that I think it is rare to have a ton of friends living close by, unless you're living in the trendy parts. It has been my experience (after moving to Hoboken) that any "negative" that people perceive about Hoboken is either just made up (they've never visited Hoboken) or, and this I totally understand, is "I don't want to live in Jersey." Which is why I say I'm still a New Yorker.