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This mirrors my experience - I grew up in Britain, Germany and Hong Kong, before my parents moved to Chicago when I was 11, in 1994. There were rules on my pre

This mirrors my experience - I grew up in Britain, Germany and Hong Kong, before my parents moved to Chicago when I was 11, in 1994. There were rules on my pre-American childhood. Strict rules - but as you say, there was freedom - I thought nothing of cycling off into the mountains alone in the winter, of getting on a train and going to the city to meet friends, of building a treehouse in the woods complete with punji traps. Cue America. I spent most of the year I was at school there being suspended for such misdeeds as walking the few miles home instead of waiting for a broken down school bus, climbing trees, and sword fighting with sticks; being a kid, in short. Hell, they even suspended me for reading under the desk, because I usually finished the period assignment in the first 5-10 minutes. The breaking point was when I cycled from our ‘burb to downtown Chicago to meet a friend for a movie. My parents knew where I was, it was the weekend. Another parent from the same school spotted me cycling around downtown. Called the police. I got home that evening to find half a dozen cops sat there at the house, threatening my parents with me being put into care, them being imprisoned, and all the rest. Apparently I was in mortal danger by... being on a bicycle without an adult? After that, they didn’t want me going anywhere without them or another adult. I ended up just not going anywhere. I went back to school in the UK. Also, the education was years behind that which I had had previously - I mean, they only had two subjects - “soclish” and “sciath”. “Bored” didn’t even begin to cover it.

aylmao 8y ago
I didn't have the experience of growing up in Germany (or the USA to compare), but I can draw parallels to growing up in Mexico. My mom sure was strict, but I had the freedom of hopping on my bike and just taking off in the streets. So many adventures. A bit too many times I got nagged for being home late, or too dirty, or soaked (we lived close to a river). Never actually "grounded" though for small stuff like that. My mom knew quite well that a long sermon and her anger were more effective in making me feel bad about worrying her. In a way, in my case, the strictness at home made the freedom of the streets both more cherished and more meditated. I think this goes to the "basics" from two comments above-- I had the upbringing to make my own decisions and wasn't just told "no" blindly. And perhaps in that strictness was also the motivation to get out of home and enjoy some freedom? If I were cozy and "free enough" at home, I wonder if I'd wanted to get out so much.
chrisco255 8y ago
I grew up in the Florida countryside in the 80s and 90s and there was no such restrictions on my siblings and I and our playtime. We rode our bikes everywhere. We built forts, climbed into trash pits to dig for hidden gems, climbed trees and fell out of them, and later when we got older, we rode four wheelers and dirt bikes everywhere. We fished and hunted too. I was even then a big geek and played plenty of video games but I definitely balanced that with outdoors activities. I find myself craving more of that now in my 30s than I bothered to in my 20s.

aylmao 8y ago

I didn't have the experience of growing up in Germany (or the USA to compare), but I can draw parallels to growing up in Mexico. My mom sure was strict, but I had the freedom of hopping on my bike and just taking off in the streets. So many adventures. A bit too many times I got nagged for being home late, or too dirty, or soaked (we lived close to a river). Never actually "grounded" though for small stuff like that. My mom knew quite well that a long sermon and her anger were more effective in making me feel bad about worrying her. In a way, in my case, the strictness at home made the freedom of the streets both more cherished and more meditated. I think this goes to the "basics" from two comments above-- I had the upbringing to make my own decisions and wasn't just told "no" blindly. And perhaps in that strictness was also the motivation to get out of home and enjoy some freedom? If I were cozy and "free enough" at home, I wonder if I'd wanted to get out so much.

chrisco255 8y ago

I grew up in the Florida countryside in the 80s and 90s and there was no such restrictions on my siblings and I and our playtime. We rode our bikes everywhere. We built forts, climbed into trash pits to dig for hidden gems, climbed trees and fell out of them, and later when we got older, we rode four wheelers and dirt bikes everywhere. We fished and hunted too. I was even then a big geek and played plenty of video games but I definitely balanced that with outdoors activities. I find myself craving more of that now in my 30s than I bothered to in my 20s.