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Tangential but reading this thread I feel many words have apparently changed meaning. Parent mentions that receiving the notifications are 'agonizing'. Another

• Retric 8y ago
  Most people have never had a crushed leg so their scale is limited to what they have experienced. Think back on all the insignificant trauma that seemed so important in high school. Within the range if the average American student, these things are a big deal.
• profquail 8y ago
  Cambridge English dicctionary has “causing extreme worry” as the 2nd definition of “agonizing”: https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/agonizing https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/agonizin... An example they give for this definition of the word is: “She went through an agonizing few weeks waiting for the test results.” — which is how the GP used it.
  • raarts 8y ago
    You are not wrong, but I think the 'test results' in the example refer to medical testing for a serious disease, and not a school test.
• XMPPwocky 8y ago
  > And I personally think learning your kids to grow a thick skin to cope with the adult world is a good thing, What does this actually mean? My reading of it is- "as adults kids will be stressed, so don't try to keep them from being stressed when they're kids or else they won't be able to deal with stress later." Fair? If so, I have a modest proposal for you. Instead of providing the grades immediately, delay them by a random amount- weeks or months. Then, immediately notify both parent and child, at a random time of day. Perhaps weight it more heavily during mealtimes. Additionally, grade a small fraction of assignments- say, 5%- as zeroes regardless of actual performance- this will ensure that academically gifted children, even those whose parents don't pressure them- are also stressed. Since children are likely to outlive their parents, we should also randomly select some children, tell them their parents have died suddenly, and let them start to come to terms with that loss before it happens. Finally, all shoes and socks must surely be banned, to ensure the proper development of calluses on children's feet. Surely this will help make kids more resilient. Suffering is part of life, so children must suffer early and often or they'll be too weak.
  • jacobolus 8y ago
    > Finally, all shoes and socks must surely be banned, to ensure the proper development of calluses on children's feet. Banned sounds kind of harsh, but in moderate climates going barefoot as much as possible is a good idea, especially for children. Instead of a ban, it would be better to run a public education campaign, do more serious research about the effects of wearing shoes, etc. In particular it would be nice if people were better educated about the possibility of using thin flexible shoes and ditching stiff-bottomed shoes, which are quite terrible for foot development. Development of calluses is one minor effect of going barefoot, but also the bottoms of the feet do not become hyper-sensitized (as they are for the habitually shod), the feet do not become deformed into a weird shoe shape with the toes crushed inward (as sadly happens for most people in our society), and perhaps most noticeably the muscles of the feet and lower leg become much stronger and more coordinated and motor control develops quite a bit better. Kids who habitually walk around barefoot learn to move quickly, efficiently, gracefully, with good balance. Source: my 2.5 year old kid has 1.5 years of experience walking around the city, about 90% of that barefoot, and is about as fast and coordinated as the typical 3.5 year old around here. (I’m sure he would be below average among some hunter–gatherer tribe; surpassing typical American city kids is a pretty low bar.)
• jdietrich 8y ago
  I think it's worth reflecting on different attitudes to education. For a lot of parents and young people, education is perceived as a high-stakes, zero-sum game that determines whether you get to live a decent life. If you don't get the grades you need to proceed to the next level of that game, you're doomed to poverty, misery and hopelessness. That perspective isn't particularly rational, but it's not entirely baseless either; if you come from a disadvantaged background, your statistical life prospects really are very poor if you don't get a decent credential. The difference between scraping a C and flunking a class might have a real and meaningful impact on the rest of your life. I can fully understand why some people might experience a bad grade as "agonizing" or "horrible". If you don't have a great deal of confidence in your academic abilities or you have an underlying anxiety disorder, that notification on your phone might feel like confirmation that you're worthless and useless and completely doomed. It might feel like another dash of salt in an old and purulent psychic wound.
• anomaloustho 8y ago
  You’ve mostly been referencing physical ailments like a “crushed leg” or physical disease (in a subsequent reply). Most of this discussion is revolved around psychological ailments and psychological trauma. Which affect a significant number of people and their loved ones. I don’t think we should discount psychological health so much merely to contrast it against physical health. Also, isn’t the physical world and your experience of a crushed leg a product of your brain? Chronic stress and anxiety are also a product of the brain and in the physical world it ends up shortening your life span. It could be equally reasonable to say, “This bad grade is killing me.” - because with modern science we know there is possibly a literal truth to that.