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Counterpoint: There's definitely an argument for letting kids figure some things out on their own. Giving them autonomy helps them mature faster in a number of

Counterpoint: There's definitely an argument for letting kids figure some things out on their own. Giving them autonomy helps them mature faster in a number of ways. If your life is micro managed down to the minute you won't learn the self discipline to do things without an authority figure looming over you. Learning to solve disputes amicably between each other without requiring an authority figure is very important and helps kids make friends. Learning to test your own limits and push your own abilities in unsupervised activities will improve their confidence more than in a structured sanitized program where everyone gets participation trophies. Helicopter parents won't be around forever. I've seen many young adults completely melt down and go off the rails when they leave their home and go to college because they never learned real self discipline. They simply can't handle the vacuum that opens up in their lives without the micromanagement. Every kid is different though, some need more structure and some need more autonomy to mature into responsible adults.

Domenic_S 8y ago
> Learning to solve disputes amicably between each other without requiring an authority figure is very important and helps kids make friends. Yes yes yes. When you fix everything for them, all they learn is "go talk to whoever is in power when I have a problem." They don't learn proper boundaries, how to negotiate, etc.
- SketchySeaBeast 8y ago
  On the other side of it, the 3 years older, 50 lbs heavier bully is just teaching them how to be afraid.
frereubu 8y ago
> I've seen many young adults completely melt down and go off the rails when they leave their home and go to college because they never learned real self discipline. Absolutely. And it's not a new thing, just different reasons. My dad, who was born in the 1920s, came from a puritan Christian background (Plymouth Brethren). We asked a few friends of his to speak at his funeral, and one talked about how, when he got to university, he discovered he enjoyed alcoholic drinks. However, because control had always come from outside - The Church - he had no internal limits and would regularly drink until he passed out. Even in his later life my mum would need to tug his sleeve during parties when he was starting to go from merry to drunk. Having said that, it's very difficult to get the sweet spot between giving kids leeway and leaving them open to turning feral. A colleague's kid recently got drawn into a gang and was arrested for credit card fraud despite attentive parenting.
skookumchuck 8y ago
> They simply can't handle the vacuum that opens up in their lives without the micromanagement. Maybe that has something to do with the drift of young adults to the left. They need some other authority to manage their lives.
- HarryHirsch 8y ago
  Say what? Authoritarian politicians are on the right! Brazil's Jair Bolsonaro isn't a leftist.
  - skookumchuck 8y ago
    Before Obamacare, I had a choice in health insurance providers, and could choose not to buy it. After Obamacare, there is only one insurance provider left in my county, and I am forced to buy it by law. That's authoritarian. I'm also paying more than double than before Obamacare.
  - raarts 8y ago
    GP was deleted so I don't know what it said, but authoritarianism happens both on the right and on the left. [1] [1] https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Authoritarianism https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Authoritarianism

Domenic_S 8y ago

> Learning to solve disputes amicably between each other without requiring an authority figure is very important and helps kids make friends. Yes yes yes. When you fix everything for them, all they learn is "go talk to whoever is in power when I have a problem." They don't learn proper boundaries, how to negotiate, etc.

SketchySeaBeast 8y ago
On the other side of it, the 3 years older, 50 lbs heavier bully is just teaching them how to be afraid.

frereubu 8y ago

> I've seen many young adults completely melt down and go off the rails when they leave their home and go to college because they never learned real self discipline. Absolutely. And it's not a new thing, just different reasons. My dad, who was born in the 1920s, came from a puritan Christian background (Plymouth Brethren). We asked a few friends of his to speak at his funeral, and one talked about how, when he got to university, he discovered he enjoyed alcoholic drinks. However, because control had always come from outside - The Church - he had no internal limits and would regularly drink until he passed out. Even in his later life my mum would need to tug his sleeve during parties when he was starting to go from merry to drunk. Having said that, it's very difficult to get the sweet spot between giving kids leeway and leaving them open to turning feral. A colleague's kid recently got drawn into a gang and was arrested for credit card fraud despite attentive parenting.

skookumchuck 8y ago

> They simply can't handle the vacuum that opens up in their lives without the micromanagement. Maybe that has something to do with the drift of young adults to the left. They need some other authority to manage their lives.

HarryHirsch 8y ago
Say what? Authoritarian politicians are on the right! Brazil's Jair Bolsonaro isn't a leftist.
- skookumchuck 8y ago
  Before Obamacare, I had a choice in health insurance providers, and could choose not to buy it. After Obamacare, there is only one insurance provider left in my county, and I am forced to buy it by law. That's authoritarian. I'm also paying more than double than before Obamacare.
- raarts 8y ago
  GP was deleted so I don't know what it said, but authoritarianism happens both on the right and on the left. [1] [1] https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Authoritarianism https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Authoritarianism