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I had a lot of anxiety about chores as a kid. As a child, I wanted to be taught very much to do them, but would get yelled at for being in the middle of things
by hnuser355 8y ago
I had a lot of anxiety about chores as a kid. As a child, I wanted to be taught very much to do them, but would get yelled at for being in the middle of things if I tried to insert myself. I guess that later my parents would randomly come up chores on the spot depending on how bad of a mood they were in and how much they wanted to annoy the children. I remember still being interested in doing chores but ended up begging my parents for the household to make some sort of chore chart or something so we could know who does what on what days instead of being randomly ordered to do huge amounts of stuff on no notice alternating with nothing. Unfortunately this was not allowed as my mother thought I would scam them by only doing the chores on the chart and not waiting on their beck and call at all times. Actually, this reminds me of a lot of ineffective managers in retrospect.
- maxxxxx 8y agoMy dad was the same way. He constantly complained about me not helping but when we agreed on me helping with something he usually changed the time and then I had already other plans. It was constant drama for really no good reason. He also never showed me how to do something. On the other hand my mom usually discussed what to do, when and how, and things got done with much less friction. And yes, it really reminds me of some managers that constantly change plans and then are surprised that people don't follow enthusiastically.
- klenwell 8y agoI can relate. Especially the pointless drama. I remember dreading yard work, especially having to pick weeds. It felt so pointless and arbitrary -- a real chore. Years later I was listening to an interview on the radio with a famous naturalist or environmentalist or something. He said his parents wouldn't let him pick a weed if he couldn't identify it. Damn, I thought. That's brilliant. That's the kind of parents I wish I had.
- iamdave 8y agoHear hear. I grew up in one of those "children are meant to be seen, not heard" households, so attempts to be helpful and part of things was always rebuffed with "no you'll just getting in the way and break something". Made resentment of being given chores arbitrarily that much more intense, because why would I want to help now? Of course, being older now with my own home I work hard to keep things tidy as a point of pride, no kids but if they ever come along I'm going to make sure if they want to help out that they feel involved and maybe learn something in the process-the kind of parents I wish I had.