4 ms·

He still sounds self-centered, and I do have a psych degree. He took credit for everything that worked ("Look, I got a job!" "Look, my bold daring attempt at be

He still sounds self-centered, and I do have a psych degree. He took credit for everything that worked ("Look, I got a job!" "Look, my bold daring attempt at being clever worked!") , then dismissed any naysayers almost entirely out of hand (Paraphrased: "It's easy to be anonymous on the internet", "Oh, you thought I was being serious? I was just exaggerating for my silly website", "You think I'm "x"? LOL well, you're the expert") I'm glad he got a job, and working at a start-up will definitely be a great learning experience. But I wish the followup focused on things he did both right and wrong, and how he or other people could improve the experience next time, instead of acting so defensive.

BrandonM 16y ago
With people like you who have never had a real conversation with him judging him based on a single action, how can he be expected not to act defensive? Was part of that psych degree learning how to form opinions of someone based on one piece of his writing, without even seeing him in person to see his body language? And who cares if you're self-centered, anyways? The world you see is your world. You can take control of it and make your life what you want it to be, or you can float along on the tides of fate and call the ones who don't self-centered. The funniest part, to me, is that you call him self-centered, but at the same time you expect him to write his article in a way that gives you value.
- eggbrain 16y ago
  One of the argument he makes is that everyone on the internet is an amateur psychologist, and that anonymity was the only prerequisite for a psych degree. He then used this to assume that people who called him self-centered had no basis for doing so. I was asserting the fact that he came across as self-centered, and I did, in fact, have a psych degree. His response wasn't a good argument, it was dismissing naysayers out of hand as not having expertise in the area. What will his response be to me? That I don't have a PHD? That I have never met him? If I met him, and still thought he was self-centered, would that change his mind? What about 50 people who meet him? Even if he knows he is not self-centered, if his perception is as such, wouldn't that warrant addressing outside of "no you guys don't understand me, you never met me, you guys are a bunch of amateur psychologists". You do three things in your post: claim that I can't tell he's self centered, claim that self-centeredness isn't important, then call me self-centered. Which is it? Is it all three? If so, what does it matter that I think he's self centered, since it doesn't matter? As for the final statement, I gave my opinion as to how I think his post could have helped more people, including me. Is it self-centered to lament that there could have possibly been a better way to go about the followup? Or should critique not be part of any article or post at all?
  - BrandonM 16y ago
    I wish your followup focused on things I did both right and wrong, and how I or other people could improve my comments next time, instead of acting so defensive.
    - eggbrain 16y ago
      This is a completely wrong analogy. In the original post, I said he should have used his followup to focus on what HE did right/wrong. Why in your comment has it suddenly changed to me improving what YOU did right/wrong? This seems like a straw man, that is also trying to be an Ad Hominem attack.
mccon104 16y ago
What you don't believe the defensiveness was merited? The top comment on HN (with 136 karma) was run4yourlives decrying his generation's lack of humility and saying "You are not fucking special in any way shape or form." You mean to tell me you wouldn't be a little bit defensive? Don't kid yourself. Also- just because you, psych degree and all, think he is self centered doesn't mean anything more than you, eggbrain, feel he is self centered. Give him some credit. He was in a rut, tried something new, and was successful. And now you want him to feel bad about it?
- eggbrain 16y ago
  I am not denying his success, in fact, I think it was an interesting spin mixed with some good timing that he made successful. That being said, while some of the comments in the original thread were in poor taste, his defense came off sounding petty, rather than well thought out. Instead of addressing the concerns people had with him thoughtfully (maybe I worded my orginal post too strongly, I never meant to come off as being being arrogant, simply someone frustrated with the job search process. Next time I'll also add my qualifications as well, so that way I can get applicants for X, etc), he basically just retorted back with "everyone is wrong, they don't know me" kind of mentality. He basically does no self-critiquing, but rather puts it off on other factors (it was a joke/you are all wrong/you didn't understand) vs taking blame (or talking about improvements) that he could use for next time. So it came off as sounding like "Hey look, I got a job, I was right, the haters can hate" kind of thing, which didn't really improve his image from what some people thought was self-centered.

BrandonM 16y ago

With people like you who have never had a real conversation with him judging him based on a single action, how can he be expected not to act defensive? Was part of that psych degree learning how to form opinions of someone based on one piece of his writing, without even seeing him in person to see his body language? And who cares if you're self-centered, anyways? The world you see is your world. You can take control of it and make your life what you want it to be, or you can float along on the tides of fate and call the ones who don't self-centered. The funniest part, to me, is that you call him self-centered, but at the same time you expect him to write his article in a way that gives you value.

eggbrain 16y ago
One of the argument he makes is that everyone on the internet is an amateur psychologist, and that anonymity was the only prerequisite for a psych degree. He then used this to assume that people who called him self-centered had no basis for doing so. I was asserting the fact that he came across as self-centered, and I did, in fact, have a psych degree. His response wasn't a good argument, it was dismissing naysayers out of hand as not having expertise in the area. What will his response be to me? That I don't have a PHD? That I have never met him? If I met him, and still thought he was self-centered, would that change his mind? What about 50 people who meet him? Even if he knows he is not self-centered, if his perception is as such, wouldn't that warrant addressing outside of "no you guys don't understand me, you never met me, you guys are a bunch of amateur psychologists". You do three things in your post: claim that I can't tell he's self centered, claim that self-centeredness isn't important, then call me self-centered. Which is it? Is it all three? If so, what does it matter that I think he's self centered, since it doesn't matter? As for the final statement, I gave my opinion as to how I think his post could have helped more people, including me. Is it self-centered to lament that there could have possibly been a better way to go about the followup? Or should critique not be part of any article or post at all?
- BrandonM 16y ago
  I wish your followup focused on things I did both right and wrong, and how I or other people could improve my comments next time, instead of acting so defensive.
  - eggbrain 16y ago
    This is a completely wrong analogy. In the original post, I said he should have used his followup to focus on what HE did right/wrong. Why in your comment has it suddenly changed to me improving what YOU did right/wrong? This seems like a straw man, that is also trying to be an Ad Hominem attack.

mccon104 16y ago

What you don't believe the defensiveness was merited? The top comment on HN (with 136 karma) was run4yourlives decrying his generation's lack of humility and saying "You are not fucking special in any way shape or form." You mean to tell me you wouldn't be a little bit defensive? Don't kid yourself. Also- just because you, psych degree and all, think he is self centered doesn't mean anything more than you, eggbrain, feel he is self centered. Give him some credit. He was in a rut, tried something new, and was successful. And now you want him to feel bad about it?

eggbrain 16y ago
I am not denying his success, in fact, I think it was an interesting spin mixed with some good timing that he made successful. That being said, while some of the comments in the original thread were in poor taste, his defense came off sounding petty, rather than well thought out. Instead of addressing the concerns people had with him thoughtfully (maybe I worded my orginal post too strongly, I never meant to come off as being being arrogant, simply someone frustrated with the job search process. Next time I'll also add my qualifications as well, so that way I can get applicants for X, etc), he basically just retorted back with "everyone is wrong, they don't know me" kind of mentality. He basically does no self-critiquing, but rather puts it off on other factors (it was a joke/you are all wrong/you didn't understand) vs taking blame (or talking about improvements) that he could use for next time. So it came off as sounding like "Hey look, I got a job, I was right, the haters can hate" kind of thing, which didn't really improve his image from what some people thought was self-centered.