7 ms·

One day he will catch an employee stealing, fly into a rage and fire the entire workforce. He'll lock the iron gates to the factory and sequester himself from t

by spuz 8y ago

One day he will catch an employee stealing, fly into a rage and fire the entire workforce. He'll lock the iron gates to the factory and sequester himself from the public eye for several decades sparking all kinds of rumours about his fate. Then one day he'll announce a competition for children to win golden tickets to visit his once grand factory and we'll finally discover the real story of Elon Musk and his Gigafactory.

grecy 8y ago
> Then one day he'll announce a competition for children to win golden tickets to visit his grand factory I feel like this is exactly the kind of quirky thing he'd do anyway, without all that negative stuff.
- InitialLastName 8y ago
  "Every car has a chance of having a winning ticket in the glove compartment" The only problem is that then they actually have to manufacture enough cars to drive a competition like that.
  - InitialLastName 8y ago
    Not to mention the lobbying costs of making states change their driving age limits so that children can buy cars.
    - dkersten 8y ago
      When the self driving cars take over, there’s no reason not to sell to children! Think of all the money to be made!
  - donkeyd 8y ago
    They're producing 7000 Model 3 a week. That's more than any other electric car currently, as far as I know.
    - camjohnson26 8y ago
      Do You have a source for that number, that sounds way too high.
      - grecy 8y ago
        The quarter is almost over, we'll have hard numbers soon.
      - donkeyd 8y ago
        My bad, they were pushing for it [0]. Actual number according to Bloomberg is 4k [1]. [0] https://electrek.co/2018/11/15/tesla-model-3-production-7000-per-week/ https://electrek.co/2018/11/15/tesla-model-3-production-7000... [1] https://www.bloomberg.com/graphics/2018-tesla-tracker/ https://www.bloomberg.com/graphics/2018-tesla-tracker/
    - cjhopman 8y ago
      They aren't even sustainably producing the 5k/week that they said they would be doing a year ago. In both 2016 and 2017, they said they'd get to a sustainable 5k by the end of 2017. At the end of 2017, they pushed that to Q1/2018. In Q1/2018, they pushed that to Q2. In Q2 they give up on the sustainable part of that and just said they'd do 5k. At the beginning of Q3/2018 they said they'd get to a sustainable 6k/week in Q3. By the end of Q3 they still weren't able to sustain 5k/week. As we approach the end of Q4, everything indicates that they still can't sustain 5k/week.
Graham24 8y ago
I'm expecting him to announce that he's bought an old extinct hollowed out volcano and is recruiting for goons.
TeMPOraL 8y ago
There a was /r/WritingPrompts thread about this. Here's a nice story: https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/6i5aef/wp_after_a_spacex_mission_elon_musk_suddenly/dj3mybk/ https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/6i5aef/wp_a...
Derek_MK 8y ago
And he'll still blame the SEC for him not making money
stuntkite 8y ago
Fuck, I love this so much because it feels realer than the reality that is happening.

by spuz 8y ago

grecy 8y ago

> Then one day he'll announce a competition for children to win golden tickets to visit his grand factory I feel like this is exactly the kind of quirky thing he'd do anyway, without all that negative stuff.

InitialLastName 8y ago
"Every car has a chance of having a winning ticket in the glove compartment" The only problem is that then they actually have to manufacture enough cars to drive a competition like that.
- InitialLastName 8y ago
  Not to mention the lobbying costs of making states change their driving age limits so that children can buy cars.
  - dkersten 8y ago
    When the self driving cars take over, there’s no reason not to sell to children! Think of all the money to be made!
- donkeyd 8y ago
  They're producing 7000 Model 3 a week. That's more than any other electric car currently, as far as I know.
  - camjohnson26 8y ago
    Do You have a source for that number, that sounds way too high.
    - grecy 8y ago
      The quarter is almost over, we'll have hard numbers soon.
    - donkeyd 8y ago
      My bad, they were pushing for it [0]. Actual number according to Bloomberg is 4k [1]. [0] https://electrek.co/2018/11/15/tesla-model-3-production-7000-per-week/ https://electrek.co/2018/11/15/tesla-model-3-production-7000... [1] https://www.bloomberg.com/graphics/2018-tesla-tracker/ https://www.bloomberg.com/graphics/2018-tesla-tracker/
  - cjhopman 8y ago
    They aren't even sustainably producing the 5k/week that they said they would be doing a year ago. In both 2016 and 2017, they said they'd get to a sustainable 5k by the end of 2017. At the end of 2017, they pushed that to Q1/2018. In Q1/2018, they pushed that to Q2. In Q2 they give up on the sustainable part of that and just said they'd do 5k. At the beginning of Q3/2018 they said they'd get to a sustainable 6k/week in Q3. By the end of Q3 they still weren't able to sustain 5k/week. As we approach the end of Q4, everything indicates that they still can't sustain 5k/week.

Graham24 8y ago

I'm expecting him to announce that he's bought an old extinct hollowed out volcano and is recruiting for goons.

TeMPOraL 8y ago

There a was /r/WritingPrompts thread about this. Here's a nice story: https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/6i5aef/wp_after_a_spacex_mission_elon_musk_suddenly/dj3mybk/ https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/6i5aef/wp_a...

Derek_MK 8y ago

And he'll still blame the SEC for him not making money

stuntkite 8y ago

Fuck, I love this so much because it feels realer than the reality that is happening.