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Father of 2 who were born 11 months apart. So I have a few pro tips for you: 1. One of you (your wife or you) needs to be fully available for taking care of th

Father of 2 who were born 11 months apart. So I have a few pro tips for you: 1. One of you (your wife or you) needs to be fully available for taking care of the baby. If both of you need to go back to work right away (probably in America), then you will need a good Nanny who has experience taking care of infants. 2. You cannot wing it. Infants need a lot of attention even though they just sleep and poop all day. Again, one dedicated person needs to be there for them. 3. If you work from home, even with a dedicated caretaker, it will be ideal to have a closed door office/room where you work. You cannot work with a baby close by unless you absolutely have no choice. 4. Depending on your baby, you may have many sleepless nights in the beginning. It cannot just be your wife doing the sleepless nights. She will need your support which translates to "waking up randomly to check on your baby who is crying in their crib" 5. Do some research on this horrible thing called SIDS. Hopefully none of us never ever have to deal with it but it happens to people. Protect your baby as much as possible against SIDS by following a few basic but important rules. 6. Make a list of chores that are needed specifically to take care of the baby and divide the work between the 2 of you. Don't leave things for guessing even though be willing to change things at last min. Pro tip: No matter how much you plan in advance, a baby will make you change things at the last minute. Nature of the beast :) but still plan. 7. Family Support: If you can, get help from immediate family as needed for both emotional and physical support. You may not realize but even a 30 min. break away from the baby can do wonders to your emotional well being. Babies are tough and they will test your patience. That's ok. Just learn to find some time away from all of it. Family members specially moms/dads are the best way to address that if you are lucky enough to have them close by. 8. MOST IMPORTANTLY: Don't worry about things too much and most babies turn out fine. So enjoy the little moments with them as they will grow up so fast that you wouldn't even believe it. You can never be a perfect dad or mom. But you can be a dad. Just be there. Show up. That's the most important thing. All the best!!

etxm 8y ago
This is awesome. Thanks.
jriot 8y ago
Regarding point 1, I would recommend one parent becoming full-time parent and forgo work. My wife stayed at home to raise our two daughters (both in school now). Creates a better dynamic for the children and for the parents, these aren't times you can get back.
- jeffrallen 8y ago
  This. So much this. Raising a family is one chapter in your lives. Make the decisions/sacrifices/changes/committments to do it right. You only get one chance. Here's one possible way: move out to the country, so that you can set a housing budget that does not require two salaries. With your mate, look at your relative strengths and desires, and adjust your work lives to get the income you need and not more. Spend the rest of the time with your kids. Give work travel to your colleagues with no kids, stay home. It's just 15 years, you've got plenty of career after this chapter is over. Also, to have two parents available, you need to not get divorced. Which means in addition to keeping you kids healthy you have to protect your relationship from degrading. Good luck!
- marchenko 8y ago
  If you decide to do this, take it seriously and treat homemaking as full-time work. Make regular payments into retirement and disability accounts in the stay-at-home parent's name. If you envision longer-term SAH parenting, make time for them to attend first aid, outdoorsmanship, pedagogy, home repair, etc. classes on occasion. If both parents will be at home, try to find activities that will allow you to have conversations with other adults outside of your family unit (occasional "continuing homemaker's ed" classes like those mentioned previously can help with this). Have a plan to ease back into the workforce gradually as the kids get older or suddenly if you suffer a financial shock.
ArrayList 8y ago
I hate to sound like an asshole but man having kids sounds terrible.
- swah 8y ago
  Its something for grown ups for sure.
  - ArrayList 8y ago
    I'll drink beer and have fun with my life instead.
    - tudelo 8y ago
      Just putting it out there, there are plenty of people that feel the same way you do. Of course, there are also plenty of people who don't. The great part about having kids is you don't have to :)

etxm 8y ago

This is awesome. Thanks.

jriot 8y ago

Regarding point 1, I would recommend one parent becoming full-time parent and forgo work. My wife stayed at home to raise our two daughters (both in school now). Creates a better dynamic for the children and for the parents, these aren't times you can get back.

jeffrallen 8y ago
This. So much this. Raising a family is one chapter in your lives. Make the decisions/sacrifices/changes/committments to do it right. You only get one chance. Here's one possible way: move out to the country, so that you can set a housing budget that does not require two salaries. With your mate, look at your relative strengths and desires, and adjust your work lives to get the income you need and not more. Spend the rest of the time with your kids. Give work travel to your colleagues with no kids, stay home. It's just 15 years, you've got plenty of career after this chapter is over. Also, to have two parents available, you need to not get divorced. Which means in addition to keeping you kids healthy you have to protect your relationship from degrading. Good luck!
marchenko 8y ago
If you decide to do this, take it seriously and treat homemaking as full-time work. Make regular payments into retirement and disability accounts in the stay-at-home parent's name. If you envision longer-term SAH parenting, make time for them to attend first aid, outdoorsmanship, pedagogy, home repair, etc. classes on occasion. If both parents will be at home, try to find activities that will allow you to have conversations with other adults outside of your family unit (occasional "continuing homemaker's ed" classes like those mentioned previously can help with this). Have a plan to ease back into the workforce gradually as the kids get older or suddenly if you suffer a financial shock.

ArrayList 8y ago

I hate to sound like an asshole but man having kids sounds terrible.

swah 8y ago
Its something for grown ups for sure.
- ArrayList 8y ago
  I'll drink beer and have fun with my life instead.
  - tudelo 8y ago
    Just putting it out there, there are plenty of people that feel the same way you do. Of course, there are also plenty of people who don't. The great part about having kids is you don't have to :)