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I started having strange thoughts like this at some point in high school. I remember the first one: I was talking to my supervisor, a male, and suddenly thought

I started having strange thoughts like this at some point in high school. I remember the first one: I was talking to my supervisor, a male, and suddenly thought about making out with him. It was really odd because I am pretty solidly on the heterosexual end of the spectrum, or thought I was anyway. After some soul searching I concluded I didn’t actually want to make out with this guy at all, but that I wasn’t repressing myself either. Fortunately I wasn’t raised in a totally homophobic environment so while it was a strange thought that didn’t make sense, I wasn’t freaked out by it like others may have been. At “worst”, I thought, I’m suddenly, out of nowhere, gay. I’ve read about intrusive thoughts since then and it seems like they can really freak people out. It’s weird that you have these random nonsense thoughts, but that’s how it is, at least for me. Every since I have intrusive thoughts every so often. A few times a month or a few times a year. They range from considering jumping off things even though I’m not suicidal, harming strangers who I don’t know, to harming myself or sexual thoughts that aren’t actually characteristic of my sexuality. The mind is weird! It does what it wants. It’s been a real trip dealing with that in life.

laumars 8y ago
I mostly get them when I'm stressed or anxious and I put it down to my brain looking for ways out. Eg in a performance review I might be getting a glowing report but if I feel anxious about it (eg imposters syndrome) then I'll start fantasising about smacking my boss round the head with my coffee mug or such like. I think my brain is working a scenario where if I get sacked than I've proven I'm an imposter and thus have no need to feel anxious any more. This is the mild end of the spectrum for some of the thoughts I get too (inc. ones about harming my children). Its horrible. I hate those thoughts but I literally cannot control them. The best I can do is distract myself from them rather than trying to dwell on them but that's sometimes hard to do when some of the more distressing thoughts randomly pop in.
- lolc 8y ago
  Think of the brain as a pool of subconscious thoughts where only one can rise to the surface of consciousness. To do so, it must be more exciting than the other thoughts also competing for your awareness. The decision of what is exciting depends on your past reaction to such thoughts. If you're excited (even if not in a good way) at the thought of harming your children, it will cause more such images to get through the filter more. Because your brain thinks it's an important thought and needs conscious attention. The solution (and I'm not saying this is easy) is to discard these ideas as not worthy of your consideration. Tell yourself that they are not related to your life because you won't do what they say you could do. There was an article here on HN recently that used a nice analogy to explain the concept: The Chamber of Guf[0]. [0] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=18259656 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=18259656
lolc 8y ago
Haha yeah the sudden thought of making out was weird the first time around. Then I decided if I wasn't going to be worried about the thought of harming people, I shouldn't worry about the thought of kissing them either.

laumars 8y ago

I mostly get them when I'm stressed or anxious and I put it down to my brain looking for ways out. Eg in a performance review I might be getting a glowing report but if I feel anxious about it (eg imposters syndrome) then I'll start fantasising about smacking my boss round the head with my coffee mug or such like. I think my brain is working a scenario where if I get sacked than I've proven I'm an imposter and thus have no need to feel anxious any more. This is the mild end of the spectrum for some of the thoughts I get too (inc. ones about harming my children). Its horrible. I hate those thoughts but I literally cannot control them. The best I can do is distract myself from them rather than trying to dwell on them but that's sometimes hard to do when some of the more distressing thoughts randomly pop in.

lolc 8y ago
Think of the brain as a pool of subconscious thoughts where only one can rise to the surface of consciousness. To do so, it must be more exciting than the other thoughts also competing for your awareness. The decision of what is exciting depends on your past reaction to such thoughts. If you're excited (even if not in a good way) at the thought of harming your children, it will cause more such images to get through the filter more. Because your brain thinks it's an important thought and needs conscious attention. The solution (and I'm not saying this is easy) is to discard these ideas as not worthy of your consideration. Tell yourself that they are not related to your life because you won't do what they say you could do. There was an article here on HN recently that used a nice analogy to explain the concept: The Chamber of Guf[0]. [0] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=18259656 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=18259656

lolc 8y ago

Haha yeah the sudden thought of making out was weird the first time around. Then I decided if I wasn't going to be worried about the thought of harming people, I shouldn't worry about the thought of kissing them either.