4 ms·
As a gay man in SF I only just realized how different your social experience is vs a straight male i.e. because gay men are, on average, less likely to have kid
by dawhizkid 8y ago
As a gay man in SF I only just realized how different your social experience is vs a straight male i.e. because gay men are, on average, less likely to have kids, there is never a point in time (i.e. 30ish) when all your friends start getting married, having kids, moving out of expensive urban centers, settling down, etc. On the one hand it feels like you can (if you choose) live out your 30s, 40s like a straight person would live out their 20s since more of your gay friends will be in the same boat and thus maintain a social circle in a way that might be harder if you're straight. On the other hand, not everyone necessarily wants to live their adult lives like they do in their 20s.
- internet555 8y agoI’ve thought the same thing
- mercer 8y agoThis is fascinating. As someone diagnosed with ASD, I've often gravitated towards gay people as close friends and in my social circle, and I think part of it is that there's a certain overlap in characteristics (even if the cause might be very different). While it's possible that I might get married and have kids, I'd say this is much less likely to happen for me. Furthermore, as I grow older I find it increasingly difficult to 'keep up' with the lifestyle changes and increasing 'demands' that my 'neurotypical' friends go through. I've noticed this in particular in the transition to my thirties. With my gay friends this somehow feels like less of an 'issue'. Another overlap, I suppose, is a feeling of not quite fitting in. This extends beyond just my gay friends though, and includes expats, TCK's/'army brats'/global nomads, and people with various disorders. But there does often seem to be a sense of 'not quite fitting in, together' that can be incredibly valuable.