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I find this funny. Most Indian kids are mentally harassed while American parents don't even hit their kids. I remember being hit until I stopped crying. And tha

I find this funny. Most Indian kids are mentally harassed while American parents don't even hit their kids. I remember being hit until I stopped crying. And that's considered normal

awa 8y ago
Ex-Indian kid checking in here, I don't remember being hit as a kid nor does my wife. I remember getting slapped once (I totally deserved it though) but that wasn't really hitting since it wasn't hard enough (and I was quite old). So, I don't agree its normal.
- projektir 8y ago
  > (I totally deserved it though) The commonality of this qualifier kind of disturbs me. You were a kid. Kids have no idea what they're doing or what's going on and don't deserve shit.
  - blub 8y ago
    What do you mean by kids? I have seen four year olds that know quite a lot and kids are good at emotional manipulation and pushing the limits of what's allowed.
    - isoskeles 8y ago
      Kids do this because that's their job. They're children. They often learn about the world by pushing up against boundaries. I was hit pretty severely by my parents. It didn't teach me any moral lessons. There's no way it would teach any child decent values, all they'll learn from it is (a) might makes right and (b) don't get caught. I cannot conceive of and have never heard a convincing argument for seriously hitting a child. They're smaller than you, defenseless, and we're talking about a behavior that you would, hopefully, never do to a stranger, your coworkers, your friends, your spouse, etc. Why do it to your child? The only real reason that weirdly makes sense, but I completely disagree with, is you think your child is your property, so you get to hit it.
      - thewhitetulip 8y ago
        Exactly. Kids are like sponge. They learn to behave in a way they see in the world. That's why yelling and beating isn't a good way to raise them. Source: was raised like that!
      - blub 8y ago
        My parents smacked me on the bottom or tweaked my ear a couple of times when I was a kid. I learned pretty fast that some situations are worth taking notice of... It matters a lot how the parents treat you otherwise. In my case it happened rarely and it came with a scolding to clarify what I did wrong.
- thewhitetulip 8y ago
  Well, you might not have been hit as a child. A lot of children are. And being one of them, let me assure you, none of my friends knew the shit I went through at home. Nobody still knows. So yeah, it might not be Normal for you, and I am genuinely happy that you weren't abused as a child. More power to you.
  - anxman 8y ago
    I am in this boat too. I have diagnosed PTSD that still haunts me to this day. This stood out to me from the article: “Spanking alone is associated with outcomes similar to those of children who experience physical abuse, the new academy statement says.“ Spanking is not similar to child abuse. It is child abuse.
    - thewhitetulip 8y ago
      I was totally fucked up as a child, adult. Didn't have any friends. It wasn't until I was 25 that I met my first real best friend who "took care" of me in the literal sense. Now I'm relatively normal. I literally owe my life to my best friend! Lucky they I have her
    - AnimalMuppet 8y ago
      I disagree, strongly. Spanking can be child abuse. But it isn't always. And yes, I was spanked. By my parents, and at least once by a babysitter. The only one I really remember was the babysitter, not because the pain was so bad, but because she not only pulled my pants down to do it (no padding to help me), but also eventually made me leave them down because I was going to get another spanking pretty soon anyway. You might regard that as abuse, but I remember it because it was unusual, not because it was so horrible. (And yes, I was being a snot to her...)
      - thewhitetulip 8y ago
        Well the best part of being abused as a child is that if you grow up without the typical anti social behaviour, you get some sense of clarity about how the worls truly is Other kids who were having better parents than mine are now fucking delusional while I am having the right priorities, I dont5 waste money, save as much as I can because there is no fucking way I am going to ask them for help again! Back then I was helpless, I ain't helpless any more But that is if you arent5 fucked up, if you are then you are damaged goods for life
craftyguy 8y ago
> while American parents don't even hit their kids. I remember being hit until I stopped crying. And that's considered normal reply I was an American kid hit (many times) by parents. What you find "funny" is, well, bullshit. Consider that abuse is abuse regardless of demographic.
- blub 8y ago
  Why were you getting hit by your parents? I could see it being abuse if it happens for no reason or minor things. In general I have the feeling that americans kiss their kids' ass too much.
  - thewhitetulip 8y ago
    Well, mother was "strict" so she would "discipline" me. But there is a big difference between mental and physical abuse and discipline but typically, Indian parents don't recognize it But its ok. I'm over it. Whatever I am is because of my past, or rather despite it.
    - blub 8y ago
      My parents loved me and I knew that, they sacrificed a lot for me. Physical punishment happened rarely and "for a reason". Looking back, I don't think I was hurt by that kind of disciplining. Anyway, something has to be used by parents to discipline their children; give them free courses, brochures, whatever with the proven methods to get kids under control. I've seen some complete parenting failures which resulted in very spoiled and rude kids.
      - thewhitetulip 8y ago
        Thing is, Indian parents think hitting is the only way to discipline kids. But you can raise them without hitting. American kids are more independent than Indian kids for a good reason. I've seen in movies that "curfew for a month" (or whatever they call it) That never happens in India. Also the new gen parents are utter failures, at lesst majority. Both parents work, both travel a lot to and from office, so much so that they are weekend parents and their kids are raised by Youtube. Or course there are good number of exceptions too. But majority kids these days are raised by youtube My nephew doesn't do anything unless you hand him youtube. He won't eat, brush or anything else.
mikeymz 8y ago
I'm English and used to get walloped all the time. I was a little shit though. Can't think of an occasion where it wasn't deserved and I hadn't been warned many times. Honestly didn't do me any harm but I don't hit my kids
ionised 8y ago
> I remember being hit until I stopped crying. I remember being hit until I hit back. Then I was never hit again. My parents are still the useless human beings they were back then and I'm better off without them.
- thewhitetulip 8y ago
  Well, I never did that. But now that I've grown up, I do not respect them as mucha s they expect and they wonder why it is!

I find this funny. Most Indian kids are mentally harassed while American parents don't even hit their kids. I remember being hit until I stopped crying. And that's considered normal

awa 8y ago

Ex-Indian kid checking in here, I don't remember being hit as a kid nor does my wife. I remember getting slapped once (I totally deserved it though) but that wasn't really hitting since it wasn't hard enough (and I was quite old). So, I don't agree its normal.

projektir 8y ago
> (I totally deserved it though) The commonality of this qualifier kind of disturbs me. You were a kid. Kids have no idea what they're doing or what's going on and don't deserve shit.
- blub 8y ago
  What do you mean by kids? I have seen four year olds that know quite a lot and kids are good at emotional manipulation and pushing the limits of what's allowed.
  - isoskeles 8y ago
    Kids do this because that's their job. They're children. They often learn about the world by pushing up against boundaries. I was hit pretty severely by my parents. It didn't teach me any moral lessons. There's no way it would teach any child decent values, all they'll learn from it is (a) might makes right and (b) don't get caught. I cannot conceive of and have never heard a convincing argument for seriously hitting a child. They're smaller than you, defenseless, and we're talking about a behavior that you would, hopefully, never do to a stranger, your coworkers, your friends, your spouse, etc. Why do it to your child? The only real reason that weirdly makes sense, but I completely disagree with, is you think your child is your property, so you get to hit it.
    - thewhitetulip 8y ago
      Exactly. Kids are like sponge. They learn to behave in a way they see in the world. That's why yelling and beating isn't a good way to raise them. Source: was raised like that!
    - blub 8y ago
      My parents smacked me on the bottom or tweaked my ear a couple of times when I was a kid. I learned pretty fast that some situations are worth taking notice of... It matters a lot how the parents treat you otherwise. In my case it happened rarely and it came with a scolding to clarify what I did wrong.
thewhitetulip 8y ago
Well, you might not have been hit as a child. A lot of children are. And being one of them, let me assure you, none of my friends knew the shit I went through at home. Nobody still knows. So yeah, it might not be Normal for you, and I am genuinely happy that you weren't abused as a child. More power to you.
- anxman 8y ago
  I am in this boat too. I have diagnosed PTSD that still haunts me to this day. This stood out to me from the article: “Spanking alone is associated with outcomes similar to those of children who experience physical abuse, the new academy statement says.“ Spanking is not similar to child abuse. It is child abuse.
  - thewhitetulip 8y ago
    I was totally fucked up as a child, adult. Didn't have any friends. It wasn't until I was 25 that I met my first real best friend who "took care" of me in the literal sense. Now I'm relatively normal. I literally owe my life to my best friend! Lucky they I have her
  - AnimalMuppet 8y ago
    I disagree, strongly. Spanking can be child abuse. But it isn't always. And yes, I was spanked. By my parents, and at least once by a babysitter. The only one I really remember was the babysitter, not because the pain was so bad, but because she not only pulled my pants down to do it (no padding to help me), but also eventually made me leave them down because I was going to get another spanking pretty soon anyway. You might regard that as abuse, but I remember it because it was unusual, not because it was so horrible. (And yes, I was being a snot to her...)
    - thewhitetulip 8y ago
      Well the best part of being abused as a child is that if you grow up without the typical anti social behaviour, you get some sense of clarity about how the worls truly is Other kids who were having better parents than mine are now fucking delusional while I am having the right priorities, I dont5 waste money, save as much as I can because there is no fucking way I am going to ask them for help again! Back then I was helpless, I ain't helpless any more But that is if you arent5 fucked up, if you are then you are damaged goods for life

craftyguy 8y ago

> while American parents don't even hit their kids. I remember being hit until I stopped crying. And that's considered normal reply I was an American kid hit (many times) by parents. What you find "funny" is, well, bullshit. Consider that abuse is abuse regardless of demographic.

blub 8y ago
Why were you getting hit by your parents? I could see it being abuse if it happens for no reason or minor things. In general I have the feeling that americans kiss their kids' ass too much.
- thewhitetulip 8y ago
  Well, mother was "strict" so she would "discipline" me. But there is a big difference between mental and physical abuse and discipline but typically, Indian parents don't recognize it But its ok. I'm over it. Whatever I am is because of my past, or rather despite it.
  - blub 8y ago
    My parents loved me and I knew that, they sacrificed a lot for me. Physical punishment happened rarely and "for a reason". Looking back, I don't think I was hurt by that kind of disciplining. Anyway, something has to be used by parents to discipline their children; give them free courses, brochures, whatever with the proven methods to get kids under control. I've seen some complete parenting failures which resulted in very spoiled and rude kids.
    - thewhitetulip 8y ago
      Thing is, Indian parents think hitting is the only way to discipline kids. But you can raise them without hitting. American kids are more independent than Indian kids for a good reason. I've seen in movies that "curfew for a month" (or whatever they call it) That never happens in India. Also the new gen parents are utter failures, at lesst majority. Both parents work, both travel a lot to and from office, so much so that they are weekend parents and their kids are raised by Youtube. Or course there are good number of exceptions too. But majority kids these days are raised by youtube My nephew doesn't do anything unless you hand him youtube. He won't eat, brush or anything else.

mikeymz 8y ago

I'm English and used to get walloped all the time. I was a little shit though. Can't think of an occasion where it wasn't deserved and I hadn't been warned many times. Honestly didn't do me any harm but I don't hit my kids

ionised 8y ago

> I remember being hit until I stopped crying. I remember being hit until I hit back. Then I was never hit again. My parents are still the useless human beings they were back then and I'm better off without them.

thewhitetulip 8y ago
Well, I never did that. But now that I've grown up, I do not respect them as mucha s they expect and they wonder why it is!