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Everyone we know who used "attachment" techniques around bedtime had long-term issues with their childrens' sleeping habits. We let both our girls (now 1 & 3)

Everyone we know who used "attachment" techniques around bedtime had long-term issues with their childrens' sleeping habits. We let both our girls (now 1 & 3) "cry it out." It was quite hard for a couple of weeks, but they both now have very good sleeping schedules. And, as far as I can tell, no psychological damage! Sleep with your baby if you find it emotionally gratifying, but I'm skeptical that there's any significant benefit. It didn't work for us - my wife still wakes up occasionally from disturbing "baby in the bed" dreams.

jerf 16y ago
I have the exact opposite experience; everyone who didn't use attachment has screaming wrecks at ~2 years and we're getting sleeping through the night. Sample size roughly five children, utterly unrandomly chosen. Hooray anecdotes!
- sdenheyer 16y ago
  I agree - evidence is awesome. Here's a pretty good assessment of it: http://answers.google.com/answers/threadview/id/774928.html http://answers.google.com/answers/threadview/id/774928.html One thing I don't think is in dispute: "Cry it out" works quickly and involves less exhaustion for parents and children.
  - jerf 16y ago
    Wow, nice link! It really seems to boil down to a big ol' "I dunno" from science, which is at least a bound on the virtues/dangers of the approach if nothing else. As someone who is actually relatively interested in science, I have noticed that it isn't very helpful when it comes to parenting, except in a few cases which tend not to be very surprising ("hey, don't smoke around your baby"). The studies are so small and there are so many confounding factors I almost wonder why they try. I'm satisfied with our outcome, nobody got exhausted and we're in a pretty good position now, but who really knows why?
    - sdenheyer 16y ago
      I agree with you - most of this stuff has a marginal difference on long term outcomes. The way I interpret the data is: as long as you don't abuse or neglect your kid, they'll be fine. Most parents don't want to hear this - but I think it's great! I don't have to participate in science-approved stimulation activities, I can just play with my kids.

jerf 16y ago

I have the exact opposite experience; everyone who didn't use attachment has screaming wrecks at ~2 years and we're getting sleeping through the night. Sample size roughly five children, utterly unrandomly chosen. Hooray anecdotes!

sdenheyer 16y ago
I agree - evidence is awesome. Here's a pretty good assessment of it: http://answers.google.com/answers/threadview/id/774928.html http://answers.google.com/answers/threadview/id/774928.html One thing I don't think is in dispute: "Cry it out" works quickly and involves less exhaustion for parents and children.
- jerf 16y ago
  Wow, nice link! It really seems to boil down to a big ol' "I dunno" from science, which is at least a bound on the virtues/dangers of the approach if nothing else. As someone who is actually relatively interested in science, I have noticed that it isn't very helpful when it comes to parenting, except in a few cases which tend not to be very surprising ("hey, don't smoke around your baby"). The studies are so small and there are so many confounding factors I almost wonder why they try. I'm satisfied with our outcome, nobody got exhausted and we're in a pretty good position now, but who really knows why?
  - sdenheyer 16y ago
    I agree with you - most of this stuff has a marginal difference on long term outcomes. The way I interpret the data is: as long as you don't abuse or neglect your kid, they'll be fine. Most parents don't want to hear this - but I think it's great! I don't have to participate in science-approved stimulation activities, I can just play with my kids.