Let me bring in a metaphor that might help. I grew up monolingual, and only acquired a second language in adulthood. When I was younger I would ask people wha

Let me bring in a metaphor that might help. I grew up monolingual, and only acquired a second language in adulthood. When I was younger I would ask people what it was like to speak two languages, what was going on in their heads, what did it feel like and so on. It seemed like magic. Then I moved to another country and slowly, over the years I picked up another language. Each individual step felt small. Nothing magical was happening each time. But sooner or later I could speak another language fluently. Somewhat disappointingly, there was no magic in my head. It just felt 'normal'. I suspect this is what having a great ear for music feels like. You're either born with it or build it through many many years of practice. Because of this, it never seems particularly special to the holder. (An aside: I played trumpet for 4 years in high school and still cannot tell if a song is in a major key or minor key, and cannot tune an instrument so if anyone has the secret to gaining a musical ear I'm 'all ears'.)